DONKEY SKIN -- SCREENPLAY
directed by Jacques Demy, Starring Catherine Deneueve, Delphine Seyrig, Jean Marais
© 2003 Estate of Jacques Demy
© 2005 KOCH Lorber Films LLC
[transcribed from the movie by Tara Carreon, American Buddha Online Librarian]
xune distribution CINE TAMARIS
PEAU D' ANE
produit par MAG BODARD en 1970; restaure par CINE TAMARIS EN 2003
Laboratoires ECLAIR pour les images ARKAMYS pour le son
mixage Dominique Gaborieau, Auditorium JACKSON, Stereo Dolby SR, coordination Marie Jo Audiard
RESTAURATION faite avec le soutien de WARNER CHAPPELL MUSIC France et de la REGION ILE-de-FRANCE
MAG BODARD presente
CATHERINE DENEUVE dans
DONKEY SKIN, From Charles Perrault's fairytale
Peau d'Ane, d'apres le conte de Charles Perrault
avec JEAN MARAIS
et DELPHINE SEYRIG
JEAN SERVAIS le recitant
Musique ecrite et dirigee par MICHEL LEGRAND
Images GHISLAIN GLOQUET, EMMANUEL MACHUEL, YVES AGOSTINI
decors: maquettes de JIM LEON, realisees par JACQUES DUGIED
costumes: PAGE et GITT MAGRINI, TIRELLI, MARIA GROMTSEFF
maquillage: ALEX MARCUS, ELIANE MARCUS, MONIQUE ARCHAMBAULT; coiffures crees par CARITA et ALEXANDRE, JANOU POTTIER, RENGE GUIDET
son ANDRE HERVEE, GERARD MANNEUVEAU
montage: ANNE MARIE COTRET, CHRISTIANE GRATTON
assistants de realisation: ALAIN PRANCHET, JEAN LEFEVRE; script: ANNIE MAUREL
organisation: PHILIPPE DUSSART, MICHEL GHOQUET
coproduction: PARC FILM, MARIANNE PRODUCTIONS
Un film ecrit et realise par JACQUES DEMY
[Narrator] Once upon a time there was a great king, so loved by his people and respected by others that he was the happiest of monarchs.
Happy too in the choice of his beautiful and virtuous wife. The couple lived in perfect harmony. They had a daughter of such grace and charm that they never regretted having but one child. Their palace was a marvel of taste and abundance. The buildings were magnificent. The vast stables were filled with handsome steeds.
But what most surprised visitors was a donkey in the most prominent place. This iniquity may surprise you, but when you learn of his rare ability, you will agree that this honor was his due.
However, the vicissitudes of life fall also on kings, and the "greatest" good is always mixed with evil. The queen was stricken by a cruel malady, and neither the doctors who studied Greek, nor the quacks in vogue could do aught for her.
[Queen] Allow me, before I die, to make one request. If you should wish to remarry --
[King] Never, dearest Queen! I should rather follow you.
[Queen] I believe you. But the State requires heirs. I gave you only a daughter. Your advisors will want you to have a son.
[Queen] Listen. Swear by your love for me to marry again only when you have found a woman more beautiful than I.
[Queen] Swear it so that I may die content.
[King] I swear it.
[Announcer] The queen is dead! The queen is dead! The queen is dead! The queen is dead!
[Princess] Come, father.
[King] Leave me, child. I never wish to see you again.
[Announcer] The cabinet!
[King] I'm listening.
[Minister] We think that it is bad for you and for the State to remain alone. Solitude is unhealthy for kings. It is time you remarried.
[King] Why do you always request the impossible?
[Minister] The State needs a male heir.
[King] The kingdom is at peace and does not desire war.
[Minister] Your Majesty, your advisors can but approve of your policy, but we are supposed to advise you.
[King] I understand your reasons. I can remarry. But I swore to the queen to wed only a princess more beautiful than she.
[Minister] A vain promise!
[King] How so?
[Minister] Her beauty matters little if she is prolific and good.
[King] I do not agree with you, and I will not break my promise. Search for a princess who might suit me in the neighboring kingdoms. Go! I wish but to please.
[Announcer] The Prime Minister.
[King] That means trouble.
[Servant] I beg your pardon, Your Majesty.
[Minister] Two of our messengers have brought us some charming portraits.
[King] If they are like the others, keep them. Those were so bad, you couldn't tell whether the girl was pretty or stupid. Let me see.
[Minister] Her father has the largest kingdom --
[King] Come now. Let me see! She is hideous!
[Minister] Her father would give you half his land ---
[King] Let him keep it all! Would you have an ugly queen?
[Minister] This one is not so young, but her fortune is greater by far than the number of her years.
[King] Sadness! Boredom! Pride! Hypocrisy! They are all one-eyed or hunchbacks! And probably deaf! The fairytale princesses, have they all disappeared?
[Minister] There is this one.
[King] Let me see. God, how lovely she is!
You were hiding her, traitor! How sweet she is! How pure! How graceful! Just look at that shoulder! Who is she?
[Minister] Your daughter, Sire.
[Princess] (singing) Love is worn around the neck
Love is mad
Four arms entwined
The soul is glad
Like a scarf of white wool woven
Love forms a knot
Has made me mad
Love often makes a clamor
It cries, it stings
It swears false oaths
It makes those lovers suffer
Who refused to turn the page
Is never wise
[King] How lovely she is!
[Minister] Lovelier than the queen, Sire. And much more charming and intelligent.
[Princess] (singing) When it has lived too long
Love, at the slightest snag
Caught on the nail of memory
Love dies in time
I love you so
I love you so
[Servant] Your father, the King, has sent for you.
[Parrot] (singing) Love, love, I love you so ...
[Princess] You sent for me, father?
[King] Does that surprise you?
[Princess] Since my mother's death, you have avoided me.
[King] Were you hurt?
[Princess] Yes, father.
[King] I am sorry. Solitude was my sole companion. I have decided to change. Stand, dear daughter. I was listening to you. Your singing enchanted me. If you like music, perhaps you do not dislike poetry.
[Princess] I know little poetry, but I like it.
[King] I have some poems of the future. The ancients wrote well, but the poets of tomorrow may delight you more.
"Listening to your fairy lute
trees, stones follow you, Orpheus
letting you shape them as you choose
Clio, the barmaid
Calliope phoning in a scoop
Urania turning on the gas lights
which paint the trees from below."
Do you like it?
[Princess] It is disconcerting.
[King] Your godmother, the lilac fairy, gave it to me. Her knowledge of the future amazes me. Listen to another which suits you well.
"The ring is slipped on the finger
after the sealing kiss
What our lips are murmuring
is in the ring on the finger
Weave roses through your hair."
I love you and want to marry you.
[Princess] Poetry deranges you, father. I beg you to stop.
[King] Do you love me?
[Princess] Yes, a lot.
[King] A lot is not enough.
[Princess] Allow me to go, father. I feel weary and troubled.
[King] Be that as it may, I have decided to marry you, and marry you I will. You have until tomorrow.
[King] You are wise. Your advice has never led me astray. I love the princess, and I wish to marry her.
Is mine a sinful love?
[Alchemist] Is she fond of your Majesty?
[King] She says she loves me -- a lot. Yet she is confused. Do you see what I mean?
[Alchemist] The princess is too young to analyze her feelings. It is written here that all little girls who are asked, "Whom will you wed when you grow up?" reply: "I want to marry Daddy."
[King] Have you a daughter?
[Alchemist] No, unfortunately. But if I did, I should certainly marry her.
[King] You are the wisest of the wise. I shall marry the princess.
[Fairy Godmother] You! So early! I hate to be taken unawares.
[Princess] Excuse me, godmother, but I have to tell you --
[Fairy Godmother] Don't cry, child. It will make you ugly.
[Princess] But it's dreadful!
[Fairy Godmother] Sit down. Don't tell me. I know all about it. Let me finish dressing. And dry your tears.
You, go outside and play.
Yellow isn't becoming to me. That's better.
My child, it would be sinful to marry your father. You must discourage him.
[Princess] But I love him.
[Fairy Godmother] I know you love him. But you're mixing up different kinds of love.
[Princess] I must give him an answer tomorrow.
[Fairy Godmother] The situation requires attention. Children do not marry their parents, my child. You love your father, or so I gather. But whatever their reasons or feelings may be, boys do not marry their mothers, my child. And it is the tradition in every condition for lawmakers to decree that girls do not marry their daddies.
A prince with a shepherdess may find joy. But a girl with her father can expect nothing but tainted offspring. My child, you must forget without regret these depraved phantasms. And you will encounter a ragamuffin, or perhaps a beggar prince. But kindly abjure this union impure. Life will offer you gifts, my child. But first you must conform to the plan which I have concocted for you. Have no fear of getting lost, my child. I shall enlighten you at all cost. I shall protect you and show you the way that I have traced without delay. Be of good cheer. I've fixed it all up, dear. Don't worry. Nothing bad will happen to you if you follow my advice.
[Princess] Are you sure?
[Fairy Godmother] Fairies are always right. We must thwart your father. You must tell him that you have a whim for -- let's see -- a dress the color of the weather.
[Princess] The color of the weather?
[Fairy Godmother] It's very complicated and costly. He'll never be able to give it to you.
[King] A dress the color of the weather! Is it a condition?
[Princess] Oh, just a whim.
[King] And you will marry me?
[Princess] Yes, father.
[King] The devil take me! But what kind of weather?
[Princess] Good weather, father.
[Tailor] What kind of weather?
[King] Good weather, of course! I need it tomorrow.
[Tailor] We haven't time. The color of the weather!
[Princess] He succeeded! How dreadful!
[Fairy Godmother] Let me look at you. It's gorgeous! I never saw anything like it! I didn't think it was possible. He must love you very much indeed!
[Princess] What do we do now?
[Fairy Godmother] We must be unreasonable. Ask him for a dress that is more sparkling, less common. A dress the color of the moon. Go at once.
[King] The color of the moon?
[Princess] Yes, father, more sparkling, less common.
[King] But that one fits you perfectly.
[Princess] I find it ... quite ordinary.
[King] I would not displease you. The color of the moon?
[Princess] Yes, father.
[Tailor] The color of the moon?
[King] And even more sparkling than the nightly orb.
[Tailor] Now he's asking for the moon!
[Princess] What a beautiful dress! My father is so sweet! I am full of love and ready to marry him.
[Fairy Godmother] You can't!
[Princess] But he's so nice!
[Fairy Godmother] Impossible! I tore my dress again.
[Princess] How sad!
[Fairy Godmother] It might be sad, but that's life. But something is not right. My magic spell won't work anymore. Is it spent?
[Princess] Can a spell wear out like a dress?
[Fairy Godmother] No, but it can weaken like a battery.
[Princess] A battery? What is that?
[Fairy Godmother] Nothing. I'm getting old!
[Princess] But fairies don't get old.
[Fairy Godmother] You're right. I had forgotten. Still my power over men has weakened. My spell doesn't work anymore on your father.
[Princess] I must admit that I am very fond of him.
[Fairy Godmother] Oh, no! We shall conquer this unwholesome passion. We'll be simply odious. Tell him you want a dress the color of the sun.
[Princess] He'll give it to me.
[Fairy Godmother] We'll see. Anyway, I have another idea. I think he will be surprised by the request I advise you to make.
[Princess] What request? Oh, no, not that!
[Fairy Godmother] Why not?
[Princess] That's horrible! I'd never dare. I'd rather marry him!
[Fairy Godmother] You'll have to do it.
[King] Are you satisfied?
[Princess] Frankly, I should like a more dazzling dress, the color of the sun.
[King] Is this one not dazzling?
[Princess] It could be made of gold and diamonds.
[King] Are you vain, my dear?
[Princess] Not very.
[King] Why are you teasing me? You may have the dress if you assure me it is a sign of love and not a whim.
[Princess] It is not a whim, father.
[Fairy Godmother] Go! Ask him what I told you.
[Princess] Oh, I can't!
[Fairy Godmother] Go! I command you.
[King] How dazzling! I have never seen anything so radiant! You are beautiful, daughter. Are you happy?
[Princess] I am, father.
[King] I am filled with joy. Is this your last request? Or, before our marriage have you another desire that I can satisfy?
[Princess] Yes, but I hesitate.
[King] Tell me anyway.
[Princess] I'd like the skin of that old donkey in your stables.
[King] My banker?
[Princess] Yes, father.
[King] That is a strange request, and it surprises me. Who suggested this monstrous idea to you? Your fairy godmother? She has despised me since --
[Princess] Since when, father?
[King] Never mind. Besides, I don't care what the fairies think. Especially that one! Well, if it is your last request before our marriage, it will be granted. You will have the donkey skin tonight.
[Fairy Godmother] Don't be childish!
[Princess] I cannot escape him. It is cruel to make him suffer.
[Fairy Godmother] That's just too bad!
[Princess] Why must I refuse his love? What have you got against my father?
[Fairy Godmother] I need not explain to you. Your father behaved badly in an affair involving only him and me. Fairies, like women, hold grudges. Don't cry.
[Princess] If my father loves me, why not do as he wishes? Why flee from him? I owe him my life after all.
[Fairy Godmother] Your education has been sadly lacking.
[Princess] What do you advise?
[Fairy Godmother] You must leave quickly.
[Princess] The king will find me wherever I go.
[Fairy Godmother] You will be disguised.
[Princess] You have the oddest ideas!
[Fairy Godmother] Hurry now. Wrap this skin around you.
[Princess] Oh, horrors!
[Fairy Godmother] Do as I say! Everything is planned. Where is my wand? Here is a chest for your dresses, your mirror, your diamonds and rubies. Take my wand too.
[Princess] But you --
[Fairy Godmother] I have a spare one. Strike the floor with the wand and your chest will appear whenever you want. Come.
[Fairy Godmother] Come here. No one will recognize you.
[Princess] You enjoy making me ugly!
[Fairy Godmother] Don't be silly. It's going to be an ordeal. Life is not so easy as you think, even for the daughter of a king. A coach will await you at the gate to take you to a safe place. Good luck, child! Lend me my wand to get home.
[Old Lady] Come in, Donkey Skin. I was expecting you. I need a scullion to wash the rags.
[Princess] Yes, Madam.
[Old Lady] Call me "old lady"or don't call me at all. You can start tomorrow.
Everybody's asleep today. You're even dirtier than I expected.
[Princess] By definition, a scullion is dirty.
[Old Lady] You think too much. You can clean the pig trough.
[Princess] Yes, old lady. I am tired from traveling. Where can I rest?
[Old Lady] There is a hut in the forest. Go on!
[Princess] Oh, who wretched! Where do you start? The bed. A chair. The table. A looking glass. Candles. And my chest.
Love, love, I love you so
[Minister] No trace of the princess.
[King] Search the stables, the sheepfold, the cellars.
[Minister] We searched everywhere.
[King] She was sleeping in her bedroom last night.
[Minister] The princess may have eloped with some Romeo.
[King] Nonsense! I'm going mad! Send messengers, 1,000 musketeers. Search every hamlet, every vineyard, and every meadow! Bring her back to me!
[Minister] Dead or alive?
[King] Alive, stupid! Oh, it is too hard to bear!
[Minister] What about the wedding?
[King] Postpone it! No wedding! No feast! No decorations! No cake! No bells! Leave me in peace until you find her. I can be consoled only by her presence. Be gone!
[Children] Oh, how disgusting! Oh, how dirty! Oh, how filthy!
[Woman] The poor thing! She must be sick!
[Woman] Her skin must hide some disease. Maybe the mange! Just look at her.
[Woman] You can't tell her hands from her face with that hair all over her!
[Woman] She won't have a chance to see the prince.
[Woman] Before kissing her, he'd have to wash her.
[Woman] Her skin must smell musky.
[Man] The old lady said that you must clean the stables and the barn.
[Woman] Do you know why?
[Man] How would I know?
[Woman] Our prince is coming Sunday.
[Man] He insists on cleanliness.
[Woman] She doesn't!
[Man] Oh, how disgusting!
[Woman] Let's get away from here!
[Man] She infests the air.
[Woman] They say she's evil.
[Man] You'd better hide. If the prince sees you, he might throw you out.
[Man] You won't be allowed at the feast. The king's soldiers might take you for a beast and kill you.
[Princess] I won't take up much room nor make any noise. But I want to see the prince go by. After that, I'll leave.
[Man] She wants to see the prince!
[Man] They'll all take flight at such a sight.
[Man] What is your name, noble lady?
[Princess] They call me Donkey Skin.
[Man] Is it your skin that stinks?
[Man] I think it is her body.
[Man] I've never seen anything so ugly.
[Princess] (Singing) Am I really guilty? Of what crime?
I don't deserve such wretchedness.
Unless a prince charming comes for me
I vow here and now to go out and find him.
[Prince] Are we almost there?
[Man] Almost, Sire.
[Man] You have eaten nothing.
[Prince] I am not hungry.
[Man] Is something bothering you?
[Prince] I was thinking how odd the world is.
[Man] They say it may stop turning.
[Prince] The fairies won't let it.
[Man] I don't believe in them.
[Prince] I do. Fairies are our inner force. They make us act, for good or evil. Excuse me. I need calm.
[Man] I'll go with you.
[Prince] I didn't say I needed company.
[Prince] (Singing) Love hides within the heart
like a thief
and secretly plans
Like a worm inside a cherry
recalling happy days
[Rose] Are you bored, Prince?
[Prince] Me? Never, Rose. There is so much to be done, to discover, to understand.
[Rose] Is it love you seek?
[Prince] Of course, like everyone else.
[Rose] Then follow the path. You can trust me.
[Prince] Thank you, Rose.
[Parrot] (singing) Love, love, I love you so
[Princess] (singing) Love, love, I love you so
Why are you knocking at my door?
I have waited so long
For you to bring me happiness
[Parrot] (singing) Love, love, I love you so.
[Prince] Tell me, good woman, who is that princess in the forest?
[Old Lady] Not a princess -- a scullion, my good man.
[Prince] She has the loveliest face.
[Old Lady] Little Red Riding Hood, perhaps! She is a lowly servant. They call her Donkey Skin.
[Prince] Donkey 'Sin'?
[Old Lady] Donkey Skin!
[Prince] What a pretty name!
[Old Lady] Kind sir, wine and sun have muddled you.
[Prince] I have not tasted of wine, and the sun shone only to lead me to her.
[Man] You look mysterious, Sire.
[Prince] I just saw an angel.
[Man] What the devil!
[Prince] (singing) Hang me
if I did not dream it
if I haven't found
love in my path
love that makes wise men go mad!
I seemed to recognize
so graceful, so lovely
My life depends upon her
I shall live for her alone
must belong to me
I had no hope
I was desperate
I went on living joylessly
Lovelier than an angel
come down among us men
I would give my life for her
even if I were hanged
I must see her again
I do not wish to die
[Man] You tremble, Sire.
[Man] There's a spell upon him.
[Prince] Yes! What joy! Prepare the horses. We're leaving.
[Queen] Were you asleep? I thought I heard you. We didn't expect you until tomorrow. I'm not cross, but you know how I worry when you travel. Did you have a good trip?
[Queen] What do you mean by that?
[Prince] That means that father should do something about his kingdom. There are still scullions living in huts.
[Queen] Take it up with your father. You look upset. Are you ill?
[Prince] I have ridden leagues. I am tired.
[Queen] You're burning up.
[Prince] I'm exhausted.
[Queen] You gallop like mad. You have a fever. Are you ill? Just my luck! For your return, I arranged "the Ball of the Cats and the Birds." The Marchioness of Carabas is coming. All the princesses want to see you. Shall I call the doctor?
[Prince] No! Thank you. Leave me. I need to rest.
[King] Where is your son? Must we beg him to come?
[Queen] I sent for him three times.
[King] Does he know the ball is in his honor?
[Queen] Yes. He says he doesn't feel well.
[King] Where is he?
[Queen] He refuses to leave his room.
[King] That isn't like him. Has he a secret?
[Queen] Not that I know of.
[King] Has he eaten?
[Queen] He didn't touch his food.
[King] I'll go get him.
[Queen] No, I'll go.
[Godefroy] Madame de Segur is looking for you. Madame de Cleves has traveled four days. They are all asking for you.
[Prince] They are all silly wenches. I want to see that girl. I want to marry her.
[Godefroy] I tell you she's a scullion.
[Prince] I tell you she's a beauty.
[Godefroy] There is much talk about your absence. If you tell them you want to marry a scullion, they'll lock you up.
[Prince] You are right. But I must find a way to see her. Until I do, I will not leave my room. I'll be sick in bed. I have spoken!
[Queen] What did you say?
[Godefroy] Your Majesty.
[Queen] Leave us, Godefroy. The king is worried about you.
[Prince] He needn't be.
[Queen] You don't eat.
[Prince] I don't feel like it.
[Queen] You left the hunt. You wouldn't see the play. You refused to come to the ball. Everything seems to bore you. Is there nothing that I can do to amuse you?
[Prince] There is only one thing that would amuse me.
[Queen] Just name it, and it will be done.
[Prince] A cake made by Donkey Skin.
[Prince] Donkey Skin. You don't know her.
[Queen] A cake? But you aren't hungry.
[Prince] It's the only thing I really want. I know it seems commonplace.
[Queen] A cake? Donkey Skin, you said?
[Prince] Yes. Donkey Skin.
[Queen] Get some rest, child.
[Queen] Thibaud, I want to ask you a question.
[Thibaud] A riddle?
[Queen] No, a question. Do you know Donkey Skin?
[Thibaud] Yes, Your Majesty. She is the ugliest beast, except the wolf. And she stinks!
[Queen] Who is she?
[Thibaud] A filthy thing that lives in one of your pigsties -- I mean, she keeps the pigs.
[Queen] Filthy or not, go! The prince wants her to make him a cake.
[Thibaud] I won't get there before daybreak.
[Queen] Then go quickly!
[Thibaud] Go ... quickly ... Right.
[Queen] She must be a good cook.
[Thibaud] We're here. Are you Donkey Skin?
[Princess] Yes, sir.
[Thibaud] I am the queen's overseer. The prince, who is ill, requests a cake made by you. Do you have what you need?
[Princess] Yes, sir.
[Thibaud] Hurry, scullion. We'll wait here. I hope she washes her hands.
[Princess] A cake for the prince. My cookbook!
An apple savarin? A rum Alaska? A walnut delight? King's cream puffs? No. An apricot cobbler? A plum souffle? Strawberry shortcake? A pineapple charlotte? No. A love cake!
My dress the color of the sun!
[Two Princesses] (Singing) Prepare your
Prepare your dough
In a bowl
In a flat bowl
But before you start
Light your oven
Now take some
Now take some flour
Pour it in the
Pour it in the bowl
Four full handfuls
Make a little hole in it
Make a little hole in it
Choose four, fresh eggs
Laid the very morn
Laid the very morning
for days later
a chick is bound
A chick is bound to appear
A bowl of milk
A whole bowl of milk
nice and creamy
Nice and creamy, if you please
Sprinkle with sugar
And mix well
A handful of sweet butter
A pinch of
A pinch of baking powder
A drop of honey
And a dash
And a dash of salt
And now it is time
While kneading the dough
to slip in a present
to slip in a present
for your betroth
For your betrothed
Make a wish
While the dough is resting
butter the dish
And bake one
And bake one hour
[Princess] Oh, my skin! Get up, lazybones. Wake up! Don't keep the prince waiting. Hurry up!
[Queen] How is he?
[Doctor] I can't tell. He's delirious but he has no fever.
[Queen] Aren't there any fairies around?
[Doctor] They're all busy. It's the full moon.
[King] But you are scientists!
[Doctor] The case is unprecedented.
[Thibaud] Here is the cake.
[Queen] Is it good.
[King] I don't know. I don't like cake.
[Queen] What do you think?
[Doctor] It smells like good butter.
[Queen] Here, my child. Taste it when you feel like it.
[Prince] I'm not very hungry.
[Doctor] He shouldn't eat so fast.
[Doctor] He'll get air in his blood.
[Queen] He's choking! Do something! He's been poisoned!
[Doctor] He hasn't eaten for days.
[Doctor] Give him a glass of water.
[Prince] Thank you, thank you all. The cake was delicious! I feel much better. Now I want to sleep. Leave me.
[Doctor] We must not irritate him. His illness is characterized by fluctuations. The cough is only temporary.
[Prince] (singing) I knew not that you loved me.
[Princess] Do you know it now?
[Prince] A golden ring told me so.
[Princess] There must be a spell on us.
[Both] But what will we do with so much happiness? Let it be seen or keep it a secret?
[Prince] Together we will make our life as no others have ever done.
[Princess] Our love will be a legend, and we will live long in memory.
[Both] But what will we do with so much love? Let it be seen or keep it a secret?
[Prince] We'll do whatever is forbidden.
[Princess] We'll go together to the buffet.
[Prince] We'll smoke a pipe in secret.
[Princess] We'll stuff ourselves on pastries.
[Both] But what will we do with so much joy? Life is full of it.
[Both] We'll do whatever is forbidden
We'll go together to the buffet
We'll smoke a pipe in secret
We'll stuff ourselves on pastries
But what will we do with so much joy?
Life is full of it
[Princess] We'll have a great many children.
[Both] And live happily ever after.
[Thibaud] The doctors!
[King] Have you looked in your books?
[Doctor] Yes, Your Majesty. We are all in agreement about the diagnosis.
[Queen] Tell us!
[Doctor] The prince is dying of love.
[Queen] I knew it!
[King] What do you advise?
[Doctor] Marriage, Your Majesty.
[Queen] Is it urgent?
[Doctor] The sooner the better.
[King] Thank you for your wise counsel. We'll think about it.
[Queen] I can't handle this. You take care of it.
[King] As you wish.
[Queen] Wait! I'll go with you.
[King] My son, my dear son!
[Queen] My dear child --
[King] We know everything.
[Prince] You're lucky!
[Queen] You shall have her, whether she be stupid or ugly.
[King] Oh, not that!
[Queen] You promised! Tell us her name.
[Prince] I do not wish to distress you, but I can't give you her name. Look. I shall marry the girl who can wear this ring.
[Queen] What ring is this? Who gave it to you?
[Prince] No questions!
[Queen] We could --
[Prince] No! I know you. If I tell you this much, you'll want that much.
[King] I will command the ladies to come --
[Queen] To try the ring on.
[Prince] Thank you.
[Man] "By order of the King!
All maidens are to come to the palace
to try on a ring
The one whom the ring fits perfectly
will marry the Prince, heir to the throne
The ring is very small
and the finger must be slender."
[Magician] (Singing) Come hither, ladies. This elixir of gazelle milk will make your finger so slender that you will wed the Prince. This way, my beauties. I'll make you a slender finger, smoother than a plum, and the Prince will fall head over heels.
[Woman] I've got a miracle salve to make fingers slender. Open the bottle. Rub it in well.
[Woman] Push harder, lazybones.
[Boy] I'm afraid of hurting you.
[Woman] Are you as stupid as you seem? Push it down until I tell you to stop. Owwwww!
[Girl] Mother, hurry. The Prince is waiting for us.
[Woman] My finger is getting thinner.
[Girl] Mine will fit the golden ring.
[Woman] My skin is peeling off!
[Girl] Mine is down to the bone!
[Maid] It serves you right, you giddy girls!
[Woman] The cad! The quack! Look at my finger.
[Woman] It looks terrible! Look at mine. It's twice as fat.
[Boy] They're so silly!
[Girl] He's jealous.
[Boy] All that just to marry a prince.
[Girl] You're a naughty rogue!
[Girl] Ouch! You're pinching me!
[Girl] What is it, Esther?
[Esther] I cut it!
[Boy] Serves her right!
[Esther] Make him go away.
[Boy] You must suffer to be beautiful.
[Thibaud] First the princesses. First the princesses, then the duchesses, then the marchionesses.
[King] What a crowd!
[Queen] What if it fits several of them?
[King] No chance of that!
[Queen] But if there were?
[Prince] I hadn't thought of that.
[Thibaud] Calm down! There's no hurry. And please don't push! No, I said the countesses, the behinds -- I mean, the baronesses behind.
[Announcer] The Princess (2).
[Princess 2] I have the smallest finger in the county!
[Announcer] The Princess de Mucho.
[Prince] Come back in a few years.
[Princess de Mucho] With pleasure, Your Highness.
[Announcer] The Duchess (1).
[Prince] Almost, but not quite.
[Announcer] The Duchess (2).
[Announcer] The Countess (1).
[Announcer] The Countess (2).
[Announcer] The Marquise (1).
[Announcer] The Countess (3).
[Announcer] The Baroness (1).
[Announcer] The Baroness (2).
[Thibaud] The maids first, then the cooks. The turkey keepers and scullions last. Stop your crackling -- I mean, your cackling!
[Announcer] Miss Gauthier, servant at the castle.
[Announcer] Miss Nicolette, cook.
[Announcer] Miss Saltandpepper, turkey keeper.
[Announcer] Miss Glum, unemployed.
[Miss Glum] Is it worth trying?
[Prince] Give me your hand. No, the other one.
[Miss Glum] I told you so.
[Prince] Is there no one else?
[Thibaud] No, Your Highness. There's no one else, Your Majesty.
[King] My dear child, every lady of the realm answered your summons. None of them could wear the ring. I am very sorry.
[Prince] I am surprised. This ring must belong to someone. I don't think I saw Donkey Skin, the girl who made me a cake.
[King] Did no one inform her?
[Thibaud] I don't know, Your Majesty.
[King] Bring her here immediately.
[Thibaud] Here she is, Your Majesty.
[Prince] Do you live at the third farm down the road?
[Princess] Yes, Your Majesty.
[King] Show me your hand.
[Fairy Godmother] Oh, darling! I'm marrying your father. Try to look pleased.
[Princess's Father/King] My daughter! We'll never be parted again.
[Narrator] The marriage festivities lasted almost three months. Kings came from everywhere. The King of India with his elephant. The King of Africa with his camel. The King of Siam with his cats, and coaches and sedan chairs. They say that the couple would still be in love if they hadn't died a hundred years later.
The tale is perhaps difficult to believe, but as long as there are children, and mothers and grandmothers, it will be remembered.