charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:01 pm

Guest Post II (Reposted)
by Christopher Recouvreur
August 5, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/08/05/g ... -reposted/

ALL OF YOU LITTLE MONSTERS ARE WORSE THAN RUPERT MURDOCK. (And don’t say I got that from Lady Gaga. I was Lady Gaga before Madonna was Lady Gaga. She stole that from me.) If Ralph Nader was here, he’d punch your lights out, and then put you in jail forever.

@VIAANGUS I Know you’re out there, Viaangus. That’s a centurion name if I ever heard one, and the Illuminati is from Rome. HUH, CURIOUS.

@Ken You’re not even an Asian child, and that probably makes you a rapist, most likely. Clearly that is a picture of a child you abducted in order to train into another Illuminati member by making him read Al Capp cartoons. You work in a Law Firm that represents people in legal difficulties (AKA CRIMINALS AND OR HATE-CRIMERS.) Also, I don’t find you to my sexual liking, and that’s presumably important to the argument for some reason. But your pole will not come near this hole. Just know that you could have had me, and you ruined it.

@MarcRenandStimpyDazza You suggested Charles should hit me and sell my body, and worse you stopped sending us a Christmas Card. We white out all our Christmas Cards and then resell them in packs on E-Bay. Now we only have a pack of 11, and who’s going to want that? In conclusion, you’re a misogynist and probably work for the Disney Company.

@Matthew Inman You think you’re just so clever and handsome, don’t you? So deliciously, naughtily adorable, with your Dennis from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia face and your little pile of money that could buy so many domain names… Just alpha-maleing around the Internet with so many friends and making so much money… Just using that tight little bottom to seduce all the girls into following you to Budhist hell… so decadent… like the forbidden fruit of the Internet just waiting for an older woman to teach you the ways of love… What was I writing about now?

In conclusion you are all guilty of crimes against the people’s library, and I sentence you all to $500 pain and suffering. Please
remit directly to Charles’ email address, because Kickstarter refuses to host “Fund my life” projects no matter how many times I try to tell them that my forum is a digital library.

Yours in Christ,
Satirical Tara Carreon
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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:02 pm

Ken the lawyer.
by Christopher Recouvreur
August 9, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/08/09/ken-the-lawyer/

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Ken White at popehat.com wants you to believe he is some sort of First Amendment advocate, but I know the real truth about him. He’s really a genetic clone created by Ruth Handler and Mattel to indoctrinate poor internet users into his hate group the Discordian Popes. This guy and his Matthew Inman apologist brainwashed followers will stop at nothing to prevent me from obtaining living Tyrannosaurus Rexes. It’s shameful to think of what lengths he’ll go to in attempt of achieving his goal.

I bet he had something to do with Jared Lee Loughner pleading guilty rather than insane. Ken probably called in his goon squad to scare the poor guy’s lawyer into that abhorrent plea bargain. The Illuminati have no shame, they control our corrupted government and feed our children lies. There is no truth in this world, but the truth of my word upon the hallowed internet. My doctrine of dinosaurs is the path of true salvation and life affirmation. The proof is right in front of you. Why else would Ken White try to discredit me in his blogs calling my legal tactics censorious, unethical, and possible dim witted? Because he is trying to lead you down to hell.

Just remember these few things:

1.Dinosaurs are good.
2.Ken White is bad.
3.Discordian Popes are a hate group.
4.Sometimes fast food ads lie.
Spiritually,

Charles Carreon Esq.

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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:02 pm

I am running for President.
by Christopher Recouvreur
August 18, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/08/18/i ... president/

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After reviewing the qualifications and positions of both Barrack Obama and Mitt Romney, I have decided the only logical choice for president is myself. It’s really about the issues which I don’t think either candidate are addressing. It’s about the plight of the common man, not of billionaires and liberals living off of the system. It’s about people who don’t have giant reptiles and need to fight off shadowy underworld organizations. Here is my plan to restore America to it’s greatness.

1.Clone ultimate battle dinosaurs.

2.Crush the Nazi Illuminati conspiracy.

3.Repeal constitutional amendments 1, 4, 10, 16.

4.Make trademark infringement criminally punishable with the death sentence.

5.Shut down the internet.

Awaiting your vote,

Charles Carreon Esq.
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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:02 pm

Travis Tygart and Kickball
by Christopher Recouvreur
August 24, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/08/24/t ... -kickball/

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If there is one thing I know, it’s the pain of being picked last for kickball every single time. When the girl with one leg shorter than the other gets picked before you, it stings. I believe Travis Tygart knows my pain. Why else would he spend so much time trying to prove one of the greatest examples of human fortitude was a cheat? He’s that evil little kid on Disney shows that finds anyway to sully the protagonist’s reputation. He is also on an immense power trip that only I can truly appreciate, he’s gone full USADA Carreon. His perfection of douchebaggery is so almost perfect it makes me want to cry. What could make it actually perfect? Easy. Dinosaurs. He never once demanded dinosaurs from Lance Armstrong, or even schematics for a cloning device.

You always demand dinosaurs. It’s just good evil villain etiquette to demand extravagant things. I mean you might consider Travis demanding that Lance continue to defend himself even after federal investigators gave up on the case, even after he had passed every blood test given to him, even after proving previous allegations were false, as an extravagant demand… but it just doesn’t have the same ring as Tyrannosaurus Rex. This one oversight excluded, I am humbled by Mr. Tygart’s douchery and give hommage to his complete assholism.

In Awe,

Charles Carreon Esq.
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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:03 pm

Matthew Inman has raised 1 million dollars.
by Christopher Recouvreur
August 30, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/08/30/m ... n-dollars/

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I now sit here, pondering if dinosaurs sleep standing up and if they dream, and how to best pillage the money Mr. Inman has raised for my dinocloning laboratory. I would also need a good gag order from a court so that Oatmeal guy wouldn’t go blabbing to the internet about how I was try to steal from his “charity.” His internet gang are a ferocious horde or free speakers who will not be silenced no matter how much I threaten them with T-Rex destruction, I hate them, so I must silence their master before he calls upon them. It’s like what they did with my book on Amazon.com. Even my Tara can see the truth.

For example, Matt Inman’s people made thousands of bad reviews about Charles’ book, “The Sex.Com Chronicles,” on Amazon. Obviously, a thousand people didn’t read the book,


See, all those fake reviews. She says it plainly, obviously a thousand people didn’t read my book… wait… what?! What does she mean obviously a thousand people didn’t read my book? It was a good book! People read it… I mean… I even gave it away for free… so someone had to read it right? This is quite troubling… what does it mean when thousands of people read a crude artist like Inman but not a single person will read my free book? It must be a conspiracy, it just must be.

Saddened,

Charles Carreon Esq.

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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:03 pm

Nazi Fighting Dinosaurs
by Christopher Recouvreur
September 4, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/09/04/n ... dinosaurs/

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This is why I need a Tyrannosaurus Rex. What are you going to fight a horde of Oatmeal loving Nazis with? A COMMANDO DINOSAUR THAT’S WHAT! See, I can now prove without a doubt that dinocloning is possible. If the United States did it back in the 1930′s why can’t it be done now? There is no reason, other than the Illuminati convincing us it isn’t possible. See the Illuminati know that dinosaurs could tilt the balance of power away from them, and they refuse to let that happen. More specifically, Matthew Inman and Kenneth White refuse to let that happen. This is a battle for the future, the present, and the past. A battle which we cannot lose and direly need dinosaurs to help us win.

The proof is right there in front of you. Dinosaurs have been successfully cloned and weaponized since World War II. It’s possible, it’s practical, and any sane person will tell you, a gun toting T-Rex is an awesome idea.

Hyped,

Charles Carreon Esq.
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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:03 pm

This is how I thug.
by Christopher Recouveur
September 6, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/09/06/t ... ow-i-thug/

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This is how I thug(full text). Once my detractors don’t waffle after being threatened with six figure sums, and they show the annoying tenacity to continue to mock me and bring out unethical behaviors of my past, I like to go after their employment. One of the best douchebag moves, the most censoriously brilliant play, is to try and get your critics fired. It’s right up there with going after their uninvolved family members and photoshopping dicks on their faces. Everyone uses their work computer for personal tasks, just like me. Hence it’s really easy to get people fired that way.

Even if they don’t back down after being fired, hopefully they’ll go broke and lose the ability to pay for their internet or their defense. Either way I win. If they aren’t fired they still know that if they continue criticizing me, I’ll try to hurt them in any way possible, which also chills their speech. It’s all a direct ladder of thuggery:

1.Be thuggish douchebag censor on the internet.

2.Anonymous people criticize you on websites.

3.Threaten anonymous person with big cash judgements.

4.Threaten anonymous person’s webhost for their identity.

5.Use their identity to try to shame them.

6.Use their identity to find out their employer and harass them.

Brilliant yes?

Super Thug,

Charles Carreon Esq.

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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:04 pm

My letter to my new guest post author!
by Christopher Recouvreur
September 12, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/09/12/m ... st-author/

Hello,

I do like the idea of guest uposting on my blog as I have many readers who request more frequent and varied posts but not enough time to keep up some days. My blog mainly deals with travel, legal commentary, and cloning. I was would definitely like to expand my topics and was wondering if someone could help write a guest post about luggage for the BSDM enthusiast, midget, dinosaur cloning researcher? This is a topic that greatly interests me and my readers and would add much to my blog. Unfortunately though I write about dinosaur cloning and luggage extensively, I do not know much about BSDM or midgets. If you could recommend a luggage brand based on that outline and maybe even fine pictures of midgets doing BSDM in lab coats, I’d appreciate it.

Sincerely,
Charles Carreon Esq.

On Sep 12, 2012, at 10:08 AM, Webmaster <links@sachsmarketinggroup.com> wrote:

Hello,

I recently came across your website and I wanted to reach out to you because I admin a couple of similar websites with a primary focus on travel,
luggage, etc…

I was wondering if you might be interested in linking to our website. I think the similarity in our sites would complement each other nicely.

If you would be kind enough to link to our site(s), I would be more than happy to return the favor in some form. I have numerous contacts and tons of other sites (PR 1-4).

I would be interested in a 3-way link exchange relationship with you. Our site is here:

http://www.specialtyluggage.com/links.aspx

We also have several content writers constantly creating updated content. We would be interested in a guest post relationship as well. If that would be something you were interested in let us know.

Thank you very much. I hope to have the opportunity to build a relationship!

Sincerely,
Jordan Scardino
805.494.3232


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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:04 pm

What if they have a T-Rex?
by Christopher Recouvreur
September 17, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/09/17/w ... e-a-t-rex/

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I though of something entirely terrifying tonight. What if my enemies already have a Tyrannosaurus Rex? What if it’s been some kind of cat and mouse game, but the whole time it was them just toying with me as a cat would do? That would mean that no matter what I do, they’ve already won…

Am I crazy? Could I just be paranoid? Only if it’s crazy to assume all my detractors are Nazi Illuminati Conspirators, and we all know that’s perfectly sane. Could a paranoid person come up with a website called rapeutation.com that outlined an internet wide conspiracy to drag my name through the dirt? No, of course not. I’m sane. I really am. What’s insane is people trying to tell me to man up an accept I’m not some victim, just a narcissistic asshole.

Well Adjusted,

Charles Carreon Esq.
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Re: charles-carreon.com, by Christopher Recouvreur

Postby admin » Tue Nov 26, 2013 10:04 pm

Bow Before My Lawness.
by Christopher Recouvreur
September 27, 2012
http://charles-carreon.com/2012/09/27/544/

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You are telling me these plaques aren’t the sexiest pieces of lawyer swag ever? I do not believe you. I own 1 for each year I’ve been part of the Bar. I tried to have custom T-Rex ones made, but the company said they had too many wolf ones left from some run 30 years ago to begin a new run. Which is probably why Ken at Popehat doesn’t want you to order these beauties, so I never get my T-Rex knives. He will do anything to make my life a living hell.

I made an info graph out of crayon and papyrus to show how evil Ken really is, however… it was hot yesterday and I left it in the car. It melted. Every corner I turn, every thing I hold special, Ken is there to spoil it, to tarnish it, or to make it look outright ridiculous. This cannot and will not stand. I shall draw more digital images of him as a swine. That’ll teach him and firmly reclaim the moral high ground for me. WHO’S LAUGHING NOW BACON BOY?!

Classy,

Charles Carreon Esq.

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