Part 3 of 3
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Waving at his mother from the balcony] Mama.
[Mama] Don't "Mama" me!
Ah, you do look thinner.
Everyone said you had lost weight.
I thought you had contracted syphilis ...
[raises her glasses and looks at him]
like your Uncle Orlando.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Pursing his lips to kiss his mother]
[Mama] [Ignores his kissing invitation]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] How was your trip?
[Mama] Everything is ruined by repetition,
I bought some excellent caviar on the Rue de Rivoli.
[To Porters] Careful with the Diors, you swine.
[To Jack as Alphonse] Don't worry. I'm not staying long.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Well, you are welcome here, dear Mama.
[Mama] I know you don't like me. Who cares?
Heh! Your father and I managed to have a child, and we hated each other.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Mama. Please, listen to me.
[Kneels down in front of her] I love you. No matter what has happened before.
[Alejandro] [Watching and getting emotional]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I love you as only a son can love a mother.
You are my mother, and I love you!
[Mama] Merde to love! Come, Antonio.
[To Porters] Watch those fox furs, you swine.
[To herself] Ha, love!
[Tourist] [To Carlo] How long will the president swim today?
[Carlo] Could be 10 minutes, could be all day.
[Tourist] We came all the way from Mount Pochooto to swim.
[Carlo] [Yelling] Who cares?! I don't care if you came from Machito!
No swimming until the president is finished!
Did I make myself clear?!
[Tourist] Yes, sir.
[Carlo] Oh. Okay.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [To Madonna] You know what this is? This is the Sunday New York Times.
[Sniffs the paper,and exhales]
The New York Times. God!
One day in New York is like a year in Parador.
Look at this. They're doing "All My Sons" at the Long Wharf next spring.
Bill King is directing. Bill King happens to love my work.
He told me so. I could be brilliant in this play.
And I gonna be there? Am I gonna show up? I have no idea.
[Madonna] You're doing well here.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Yeah, it's goin' okay. It's goin' okay.
Matter of fact, it's gettin' pretty easy.
Matter of fact, it's gettin' a little boring.
[Madonna] Why don't you do something good for the country?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I started that beautification program for the airport. That's the gateway of Parador.
[Madonna] I was thinking about something more profound.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Well, I decided to replace the national anthem.
[Madonna] You're getting crazier than Phonse.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Singing to crowd] Parador, Parador, I love you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Singing to crowd] Your mountains, your valleys, your rivers
Beckon to me
[Jack & Madonna bow and salute to each other]
[Madonna] Better than the old one. [Laughs]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I want to kiss you so bad I could spit.
How do you think it would look?
[Madonna] Paradorians are hot-blooded.
I don't think they would mind.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You don't think it demeans the presidency?
[Madonna] Torture and hunger demean the presidency, not kissing.
[She kisses Jack]
[Roberto Strausmann] [Observing Jack & Madonna through his telescope]
[Military Commander] Here in Sulla there have been two incidents:
[Military Commander] a kidnapping and a power line destroyed.
But an effective action was taken.
At Mount Pochooto there have been dangerous battles,
but we have destroyed the rebel forces.
[TV] [People Screaming]
[Tourist] [To reporter] I'm really sorry to see it, especially in the height of the tourist season ...
when it could scare a lot of people away from what's really a nice country.
[Military Commander] In the region of Ochito, there has been no incidents for six months.
There are secret shots taken at the guerrilla headquarters in the jungle.
Here you can see their leader, Dante Guzman,
being visited by an American liberal.
[Ed Asner] Dante! Hombre! [Laughing]
You son of a bitch! You did it!
[Jack Noah as Dictator] That's Ed Asner.
[Roberto Strausmann] I love Lou Grant.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Those guerrillas don't seem very fond of me.
[Roberto Strausmann] Communist bastards.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] What am I doing in this piece of shit? Where's my limo?
[Roberto Strausmann] We have a secret meeting in a few moments.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I thought we were gonna dedicate the dog track.
[Roberto Strausmann] This is more important.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Who's this meeting with?
[Roberto Strausmann] C.I.A.
[Car Stops and picks up Ralph]
[Driver] [To Dictator's Car] You're blocking the way. Move it!
Come on, move! Move!
[Ralph] You boys are late.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Sees Ralph and starts coughing]
I have a very bad cold.
[Ralph] Yeah, and I've had the shits for the last three days.
[Ralph] How is it, amigo, that we've been working together, what, eight or nine years?
You ever known me to beat around the bush?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Nods his head "No"]
[Ralph] Okay. Remember I told you about six months ago that the natives were restless?
Well, they're more than restless. These guys are about ready to flip out.
You and your people better put a capper on it. Do you understand?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Nods his head "Yes."]
[Ralph] Because I don't want you and your tinhorn bastards letting this thing slide to the Commies.
Do you understand?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Nudges Robert] This is exactly what I've been telling you.
[Ralph] I don't know what this bullshit is about Parador and its sovereignty,
but if it wasn't for the U.S.A. handing it over to your forebearers back in 1890,
there wouldn't be any goddamn Parador.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Chuckles] I agree with everything this man is saying.
[Ralph] Another thing is, I want you to stop listening to those faggots in the State Department, understand?
And get this. I am sick to death of backing bad horses.
This is a stakes race. Do you understand? I want a winner.
Now, you just holster your dick, okay?
Otherwise, your ass goes in a hammock back to Miami.
That is, if we let you into Miami.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Holster my dick. Okay.
[Ralph] [To Carlo] Pull over! I wanna take a dump.
[Exits car speedily]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [On P.A.] We will say good-bye to the old, hello to the new.
And so, my friends,
into the 21st century.
I promise the people of Parador ...
[NEW: SIMMS TOWERS]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] new housing,
good -- good condominiums ...
modern plumbing, hot water,
God bless you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [To Madonna] What a lie.
This is the worst slum I've ever seen in my life.
[Madonna] This is the good neighborhood.
[Roberto Strausmann] You shouldn't have brought her.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I wanted some company.
[Roberto Strausmann] You're going too far.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I'm the dictator, pal.
[Throws a shovelful of dirt into a concrete block on the ground]
[Roberto Strausmann] I can always recast the part.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I should live so long.
[Walks down the red carpet toward the car with Madonna]
[Alice Gianni] [Gives Madonna a bunch of flowers] Here.
[Madonna] [Kisses Alice] What's your name, huh?
[Alice] Alice Gianni.
[Madonna] How old are you?
[Alice Gianni] [Holds up six fingers]
[Hands the flowers to Jack]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [To Alice] So sweet.
You're so sweet. Thank you for the flowers. [Laughs]
[Dictator's Car Explodes]
[Madonna] [Grabs up little girl and hands her to a woman]
[To Jack] Follow me.
Over there. Run!
[Man] Come on! Come on!
[Soldier] Out of my way!
[Helicopter flying in]
[Masked bandit shooting from rooftop]
[Roberto Strausmann] [On the ground] Communist bastards!
[Guerilla throws molotov cocktail at soldiers]
[Madonna & Jack change clothes, Madonna into nun's outfit, Jack into peasant's clothing, and run off]
[Madonna] [Knocking on door] Carmen! It's me, Madonna.
[Madonna] [To Jack] Here, come in. Oh!
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Panting]
[Madonna] Hi, Carmen! Oh!
[Gesturing to Jack] This is my friend, Carmen.
[To Jack] I grew up here.
[Carmen] [Seeing Jack] Madonna, he can't stay here.
They'll kill him. They'll kill me. They'll kill us.
[Carlo] [Coming out of alley with his gun]
[Roberto Strausmann] Any sign of the president?
[Carlo] No, they both disappeared.
[Roberto Strausmann] You're sure?
[Carlo] Absolutely, sir.
[Roberto Strausmann] Burn it.
[Soldiers light houses on fire]
[Madonna & Jack escaping]
[Jack Noah] [To Madonna] They're gonna think I did this.
They're gonna think I'm a monster.
[Man] Free the people!
[Soldier] Let's go.
[Roberto Strausmann] Round up the usual suspects. I will interrogate.
[Soldier] Immediately, sir.
[Roberto Strausmann] [To Carlo] When did he arrive?
[Carlo] Moments ago, sir.
[Roberto Strausmann] Is she with him?
[Carlo] No, sir.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Enters Presidential Suite where Jack is carrying his suitcase]
And where did you and Madonna disappear to?
[Jack Noah] We thought we'd go shopping for a new dress.
[Roberto Strausmann] Don't fool with me, Jack Noah.
Why are you packing?
[Jack Noah] I'd like to spend the weekend in the Hamptons.
[Roberto Strausmann] You're not going anywhere.
[Jack Noah] You know, I didn't sign on for this shit.
How could you burn those people out of their homes?
[Roberto Strausmann] Relax, my president.
[Puts his arm around Jack]
[Jack] [Screaming] I am not your president! You miserable, low-life bastard.
I'm just an actor.
This is gettin' too goddamn real for me, man.
[Roberto Strausmann] You're going on television tomorrow ...
to reassure the people that you're all right,
and that the government is in control, and that the murderers will be caught and dealt with.
[Jack Noah] Sorry, I don't do TV.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Shouting] You will go on television tomorrow,
or I will cut your balls off!
[Jack Noah] Cut my balls off. I know. I know.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Sighs] You know,
I hate actors.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [On TV] Good afternoon, my countrymen.
I am very grateful to be here with you today.
I would like to begin ...
by extending my deepest sympathies ...
to the families of those innocent people who were killed in yesterday's attack.
They made the supreme sacrifice.
This attack was meant for me,
and they suffered the injury.
After this attack,
I had to ask myself, why would someone want to kill me?
Being close to death,
it has made me review my life ...
and my rule.
And so today,
[Roberto Strausmann] [Looking with surprise at Jack's TV speech]
[Carlo] [To Carmen] We got your friend.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I would like to ask the forgiveness of the poor people of this country.
[Carlo] [To Carmen] Are you afraid?
[Carmen] [Nods her head Yes.]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] And I pledge from this moment ...
to make their liberation ...
the first concern of my government.
And those of the privileged classes ...
must not resist this liberation.
I would also like to make a personal announcement today,
which should indicate the seriousness of my resolve.
I take great pleasure in announcing my engagement ...
to my long-time companion,
Miss Madonna Mendez.
Now, there are those of my advisers ...
who tell me that this is a mistake,
that Madonna is one of the common people.
Well, to me, this is her greatest virtue.
[Mama] [Watching TV] That swine!
[Jack Noah as Dictator] It is only through her ...
that I understand the sufferings and the hopes ...
of the people of Parador.
And so, my fellow citizens,
we must work together ...
to triumph over evil,
to make Parador truly ...
a land of the free ...
and a home of the brave.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Busting in to the Dictator's room]
[To Cameramen & Women] Out.
[Jack Noah] You want a Valium?
[Roberto Strausmann] So you think this is amusing.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I thought it was a good speech, yeah.
[Roberto Strausmann] It was suicide.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You're hyperventilating.
[Roberto Strausmann] I'm gonna make you suffer.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You're a Harvard man.
Use your brains. You can't kill me.
[Roberto Strausmann] You've played your last role.
[Jack Noah] You need me. I'm the dictator.
[Roberto Strausmann] Actors are a dime a dozen.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Not this good, Roberto.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Laughing] You really think you're my dictator?
You're as good as dead.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I've got an interview tomorrow with Dick Cavett.
[Roberto Strausmann] Dick Cavett?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Blows his cigarette smoke in Roberto's face]
[Ralph] [Bursts into the room] Brilliant, Your Excellency! Just brilliant!
It totally castrates the Commies.
I tell ya, you're a genius.
He's a total, brilliant genius, isn't he, Roberto?
[Roberto Strausmann] Yes. Yes, perhaps.
Perhaps he is a genius.
[Exits the room]
[Ralph] Your Excellency, uh, could I use your -- your bathroom?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Certainly, certainly. One left, one right, two more lefts.
[Ralph] [Rushes out, but goes right]
[Dick Cavett] What would you say really brought the change about?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I could give you many reasons, but the main --
the main reason is my lovely Madonna here.
[Dick Cavett] The -- The woman behind the throne, eh?
Can you tell me, uh, Miss Mendez, uh, what changes have you seen in him?
Has there been a lot of change from your point of view?
[Madonna] Well, he's not the same man I first met, that's for sure.
[Dick Cavett] Would you tell us, Excellency, how you see the future of Parador?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I would like to see ...
elections to the General Assembly very soon, very soon,
eh, to begin the problems of land reform.
[Dick Cavett] Mm-hmm.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] And also,
I would like to begin a dialogue with the guerrillas to put an end to all of this terrible violence.
[Dick Cavett] Well, I must say, that's extraordinary, because you --
Well, the idea of extending that kind of hope to the very people who tried to assassinate you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Chuckling]
We all have to live with critics, eh? Even you.
[Dick Cavett] [Laughing] Yeah, well, uh -- well, uh, mine use words instead of bullets.
I hope this isn't a rude question, or premature, but, uh, what do you see as your epitaph?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] "He played his part well."
SEPTEMBER 11, 2001 -- WHAT A REAL PRESIDENT WOULD HAVE SAID
We now leave the terrain of what actually happened, and move to a hypothetical sphere in which we can best try to shed further light on the events of 9/11. At this point a detailed account and timelines of what really happened behind the scenes on 9/11 cannot be attempted. However, we can speculate as to what an honest and courageous president might have done. Such a president might not have immediately understood the full scope of the 9/11 plot, but he would have insisted upon political accountability for appointed officials and on an immediate and thorough investigation. Some guidance might have come from an examination of the Ed Meese press conference of November 1986 which blew the lid off the Iran-contra scandal, and which was accompanied by the firing of Oliver North and John Poindexter, then the NSC director. The speech on the evening of 9/11 might have sounded something like this:
SEPTEMBER 25, 2001 -- WHAT A REAL PRESIDENT WOULD HAVE SAID
My fellow citizens:
Today our country and our political system have been targeted by large-scale acts of terrorism. These are monstrous crimes against humanity, and they will not go unpunished. We send our solidarity to the brave firemen, policemen, military people, and office workers who have borne the brunt of this assault. We promise an equitable and equal compensation for the human losses of this day. Insistent and irresponsible voices have been raised in my own White House and in the intelligence agencies, and have inspired media reports attributing these attacks to Arab or Islamic terrorists of the al Qaeda Bin Laden organization. But this is no time for snap decisions or a rush to judgment when we are dealing with the present and future peace of the world. It is true that we have bitter enemies around the world, but the capabilities displayed today appear to go far beyond the technical and physical means available to al Qaeda. We must also recall that, under the reckless and irresponsible policies of my predecessors, the CIA had been one of the main sponsors of Bin Laden and al Qaeda. If we think back to the attack on the federal building in Oklahoma City in 1995, we remember that media voices attempted in the first hours to attribute that tragedy to the Arab world. Although I am convinced that we still do not know the full story of Oklahoma City, it is clear that the Arab world was not involved.
There are too many unanswered questions at this point. How were the terrorists who seem to have been involved allowed to enter the United States and operate freely in this country? Why was there no air defense over a period of one hour and fifteen minutes? I have ordered an immediate inquiry into this question, and in the meantime I have accepted the resignations of Gen. Myers of the Air Force, the deputy chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and of Gen. Bernhard of NORAD, whose agency failed the people today. There is also evident reason to believe that the CIA, the FBI, the NSA, and the Immigration and Naturalization Service have not performed satisfactorily, based on the fragmentary accounts available so far. I have therefore accepted the resignations of the leaders of those agencies, and of their principal deputies. I have furthermore accepted the resignation of the Secretary of Defense and his deputy, the Attorney General, the Secretary of Transportation, and of my National Security Adviser, since it is evident to me that they could not continue to serve the nation effectively because of the immense tragedy which has occurred on their watch. We rightly demand accountability from teachers, from railroad engineers, and from physicians. We therefore have all the more reason to demand accountability and responsibility from those who have been entrusted with the management of the executive departments, several of which have not served us well today.
Another question involves the collapse of the World Trade Center towers many minutes after they had been impacted by the airplanes. These events, as you know, represent an absolute anomaly in the history of skyscrapers. In particular, there is no explanation whatsoever for the collapse of building seven at five o 'clock in the afternoon.
Accordingly, and consistent with our urgent measures to save any victims remaining in the rubble, I am ordering the Seventh Mountain Division of Fort Drum, New York, to seize control of the site of the World Trade Center, cordoning it off as a crime scene and taking immediate measures for preserving the evidence we must have to determine what really happened. Not one scrap of metal will be removed before a full forensic survey has been carried out. Contrary to media accounts, we have not been able to identify the flying object which apparently hit the Pentagon, although it seems likely that it was not a Boeing 757, and thus could hardly have been United flight 73. As for the tragedy over Shanksville, we are investigating whether this aircraft was shot down by our own forces, and why. All crash sites are being secured by military units, acting under my direct orders, whose loyalty to the Constitution is beyond question.
The overriding question is whether the criminals who acted today enjoyed support or collaboration from within our own country and even within our own government. I have created a special unit of federal investigators which will act under my direct orders and which will report to me and to me alone. The first task of that unit will be to determine why there was no air defense, in violation of the standard operating procedures of NORAD and the FAA. Another task will be to examine the entire roster of FBI and CIA double agents presently infiltrating terrorist groups and how they are managed, with a view to identifying possible factors of collusion. Another task will be to determine why our watch list procedures and other forms of vigilance were not effective in screening the criminals out.
As far as the FBI is concerned, I urge the Congress to join me in breaking up this tragically dysfunctional agency. After Ruby Ridge, Waco, the FBI crime lab, Wen Ho Lee, the Atlanta Olympics and Richard Jewel, the withheld documents in the McVeigh case, we now have September 11, 2001. The FBI has never recovered from the corruption and mismanagement instilled during the fifty year reign of J. Edgar Hoover, a man whom we know today to have been unfit for public office. The FBI has many dedicated public servants, but they are trapped today in a structure of incompetence, corruption, and worse. Accordingly, I am placing the FBI into receivership by executive order with immediate effect; this agency will operate for the time being under the direction of my special assistant for internal security.
In determining the full scope of what happened today, I need the help of all our citizens. If you know something important about what happened today, I want to hear it. Call the White House and talk with one of my staff, who are mobilized to take your calls. If you see anyone, including especially federal agents, attempting to tamper with evidence, or if a federal agent attempts to intimidate you into saying you saw or heard something you did not see, I want to know about that, too.
I am also determined to find out if foreign intelligence agencies or foreign citizens were involved in today's events. I am appointing myself as temporary Director of the CIA, and in that capacity I will undertake a comprehensive review of foreign operations on American soil. No foreign agency will be exempted, and I promise you a full initial progress report.
In addition to the immediate investigations I have mentioned so far, I am also empanelling a board of inquiry to study today's events and offer a second opinion on what may have gone wrong. I am asking Senator Byrd to be the chairman of this body, and Lawrence Walsh, a Republican, the former Iran-contra prosecutor, to be the vice chairman. I have invited former Secretary of the Treasury O 'Neill, former President Carter, General Zinni, former Governor Ryan of Illinois to serve. I am also actively soliciting participation by outsiders and academics who have been critics of our government policies of recent years. I am inviting Susan Sontag, Eric Foner, Noam Chomsky, Chalmers Johnson, Howard Zinn, and Seymour Hersh to become members of the board of inquiry. Let them play the devil's advocates, if they will, so long as we obtain truth and justice. They will all receive the necessary security clearances directly from me personally, if necessary. I will personally supervise the rapid declassification of documents as recommended by the board of inquiry in order to educate the public about the board's findings. We all remember the failure of the Warren Commission; that failure will not be repeated during my presidency.
I recall the words of President Eisenhower in the wake of the Kennedy assassination: the American people, he commented will not be stampeded. I ask you to support your government and its constitutional institutions, and not to give way to the voices of hatred, fear, aggression, and paranoia. I promise that swift justice will be rendered for those who have struck us today, no matter who they turn out to be.
These dastardly attacks will not force this great nation off course; they will not force us to become something we are not. We will remain ourselves. We will go forward in the great American tradition of the Monroe Doctrine, the Good Neighbor Policy, the Bretton Woods system, the Marshall Plan, and the Four Freedoms of the Atlantic Charter, starting with the freedom from fear.
Further attacks cannot be ruled out in the coming days and weeks. Because of the office I hold, and because of the constitutional responsibilities I must meet, I ask for your support -- no matter what may happen during the coming days and weeks.
A real president would have glanced at Cicero's orations against Catiline, with which that orator had gone into the Roman Senate to stop the impending coup d'etat of the bankrupt aristocrat Lucius Sergius Catilina in 63 BC, who had planned to seize power through a massacre of Roman political leaders. He would have been mindful of General de Gaulle's 1962 speech in which he expressed his determination to defeat the coup attempt of four fascist generals in Algiers.
My fellow citizens:
Tonight I would like to present, as promised; a progress report on the investigations into the events of September 11, investigations which have been the main task of your government over the past several weeks. The tidings I bring you this evening are very grave, and they are related to the tempestuous events of the last few days which are known to you in whole or in part.
As many of you may know, during the morning of 9/11 the White House received a telephone call saying, "Angel is next." "Angel " was the top-secret code word designating my official aircraft, Air Force One, so this was a threat to shoot down Air Force One. It was also something more: as I realized immediately, it was quite possible that this telephone call had indeed come from the authors of the 9/11 terror attacks. If that was so, there existed the definite possibility that this group, whoever they were, also had access to other top-secret code words used by our government. This meant that there was imminent danger that the terrorist group might possess the code words and related signals that could be used to target thermonuclear ballistic missiles on targets in foreign countries -- or even here at home. A duplicate of the briefcase known as "the football," which follows me everywhere, might be in the hands of the plotters. I decided at once to proceed as quickly as possible to the headquarters of the Strategic Air Command in Nebraska with a small force of bodyguards for the purpose of countermanding, by the immediate physical presence of the commander in chief, any and all illegal attack orders that might be issued by the rogue terrorist network which had so plainly declared war on our country. My intent was to assume direct personal control over the nuclear deterrent forces of this country, wherever they might be located.
During my flight to Nebraska, I received a phone call which presented this threat in the most concrete form. The call came from a man who identified himself as the spokesman for a secret organization of clandestine operatives and special forces -- clearly a subversive and insurrectionary group acting as a tool for a coterie of very powerful, wealthy, and ruthless persons. This spokesman told me that his organization had orchestrated the attacks on the World Trade Center and the Pentagon as a means of reversing the inexorable decline of American power in the world -- a process which I and my elected predecessors had been wholly negligent in allowing, he asserted. He also demanded that I immediately make a televised public statement identifying al Qaeda, Osama Bin Laden, Afghanistan, and Iraq as those responsible for the terror attacks, and announcing our government's plans to invade and occupy these two countries. Iran, Pakistan, and Saudi Arabia, he added, might have to come later. If l failed to accept this ultimatum, the conspirators were determined to use the nuclear launch code words in their possession to destroy Cairo, Baghdad, Teheran, Rabat, Tunis, Karachi, Jakarta, Damascus, Pyongyang, Riyad, Havana, and possibly other cities. That would start 100 years of war of civilizations, they told me, and once it had started, nothing could stop it. I told this spokesman that he and his group, in addition to being guilty of high treason, were courting suicide. The Russian Federation might interpret the missile firings as the beginning of a US first strike against Russian targets, and might respond by initiating procedures for launch under attack, in an attempt to use their nuclear assets against us before they were destroyed on the ground. The People's Republic of China might respond in the same way. These countries might also conclude that our government had been taken over by madmen, and that their only hope of safety might lie in the use of military means against us. The spokesman for the group of plotters replied that those dangers were real, but that it was up to me to avoid this danger by granting the demands of the terrorist controllers, which came down to US attacks on Afghanistan, and Iraq, with the overthrow of the government of Saudi Arabia likely along the way. The terror group, he boasted, welcomed the bloody global conflict that I seemed to fear, and even regarded the prospect of world war engulfing this planet as preferable to the relative decline of the United States for which he said I and those like me were responsible.
At this moment, our country faced the greatest danger in our entire history. To accept the ultimatum of the plotters and to wage war against their target list of Arab and Islamic states would have cast the United States adrift on an ocean of blackmail, lies, and adventures. Blackmailers always escalate their demands, and the addiction to terrorism of the victorious criminal network might have poisoned our national life for decades, or even for centuries. If I had capitulated; I would have been a puppet of the plotters for as long as I remained in office, indeed for the rest of my life. On the other side, the danger of world war was immediate. I decided that the only honorable course coherent with my oath to preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution was to defy the terrorists. At this point we had reached the SAC headquarters in Nebraska. I terminated my conversation with the spokesman for the plotters.
At this point, I activated several units of the Secret Service and Army intelligence under handpicked officers whose constitutional loyalty I knew I could trust. I briefed them on what I knew so far, and gave them the task of finding the rogue terror network and rooting it out. These fine patriotic men and women went to work at once, and within 72 hours the main outlines of the plot were evident. Let me sum up what we have learned so far.
A group of al Qaeda operatives, manipulated by a cabal of rogue CIA case officers, had chosen September 11 to hijack several aircraft, force them to land, and use the passengers as hostages to extort the liberation of certain prisoners being held in Egypt and Saudi Arabia. Among these al Qaeda operatives were several double agents, also under the control of rogue elements in our own intelligence community. These were dissolute and evil persons, who had been trained using the infrastructure left over from the Iran-contra affair.
Air defense that day was completely absent, in part because of four air exercises which were taking place at the same time in various parts of North America. A number of officers in critical positions at NORAD, its regional office in Rome, New York, and in the FAA appear to have been party to the plot. By a kind of collective inertia, they ignored the well-known and long-established standard operating procedures which govern the cooperation of FAA and NORAD, and were able to misdirect our few remaining fighter interceptors, out over the Atlantic Ocean in one case. More arrests are imminent as a result of ongoing investigations in this area.
What the al Qaeda operatives apparently did not know was that the aircraft they had chosen to hijack had been equipped with a new technology making it possible to seize control of these aircraft and operate them by remote control from a command center on the ground. It was this new technology, and not the dubious skills of the hijackers, which allowed the planes to hit their targets with such precision.
But even direct hits by the two planes could not have been enough to bring down the towers. According to the information we have developed; the collapse of World Trade Center buildings one, two, and seven was the direct result of controlled demolition -- the result of explosive charges which had been placed in these buildings over the previous days and weeks by the terror network, who infiltrated the buildings in the guise of cleaning and security personnel. We have not yet been able to solve all the problems posed by the collapse of the twin towers, since energy sources appear to have been at work which go beyond the realm of today's conventional technology. I will have more to report on this later, In the meantime, I regret to report that I have had to order the arrest of the Mayor of New York, who repeatedly attempted to bring about the destruction of evidence at the crime scene.
As for the Pentagon, it was struck by a US Air Force cruise missile fired from an aircraft above West Virginia, and not by one of the hijacked airliners. We have not yet been able to determine what happened to American flight 77, and we call on citizens to come to our aid in this matter. The launch of the cruise missile was the work of an entire Air Force unit in Ohio, and these traitors have all been taken into custody.
The airplane that crashed in Shanksville was cynically shot down through the actions of a rebel mole placed in a highly sensitive position at NORAD. This mole was aware that the passengers had retaken control of the aircraft from the lightly armed hijackers, and realized that the interrogation of the hijackers on board would have revealed critical dimensions of the real plot in which the hijackers, although certainly acting with criminal intent, were ultimately mere expendable pawns. The NORAD mole also feared that an examination of the aircraft might reveal the presence of the remote control technology, which had for some reason failed to function. Accordingly, the mole cynically directed jet interceptors to destroy this airplane, even though it was far away from any target of interest to the hijackers.
Several FBI officials and agents have been indicted for obstruction of justice; they have been accused of destroying security camera tapes at the Pentagon, and intimidating witnesses at the Pentagon and in Shanksville, Members of the FBI crime lab and the NTSB team have been discovered attempting to sabotage the cockpit voice recorders of the planes in question; the recordings we have heard are consistent with the account of the 9/11 events I have just described.
Sadly, I must address the three mysterious suicides from the highest ranks of our own government which have caused so much speculation over the past several days. The vice president was found dead in his bunker at Site R last Thursday; the coroner has ruled this a suicide, and has established that the cause of death was a potassium cyanide pill. The same finding has been delivered in the case of the former deputy secretary of defense some hours later on that same day. The death of the Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff by a gunshot wound to the head in the Pentagon at around that same time has also been ruled a suicide. I can only confirm that arrest warrants for all three had been issued by a federal grand jury empanelled to investigate the tragic events of September 11.
The mutiny of the Delta Force battalion based near Fort Bragg, North Carolina, has been quelled by loyal troops and planes. The appeal of the rebel commander for a military rebellion against the legal government and for a military coup has been ignored.
As you may also know, a top former anti-terror official and several other high officials of the CIA and FBI have been missing for over two weeks, and are presumed to have fled abroad. I can confirm that arrest warrants have been issued for these persons. A number of journalists have also disappeared, and this may also be related to the recent upheaval. I can assure you that our constitutional procedures are just as vigorous as they have ever been, that habeas corpus remains alive, well, and in full force. We have no secret prisons and no secret prisoners, and I will tolerate none. Our open courts continue to function, and they will continue to do so.
We have uncovered complicity between the rogue network in this country and a number of foreign intelligence agencies. One of these is the British MI-6. After the raid by Scotland Yard on the headquarters of MI-6 in Oxford Circus, and after the resignation of Mr. Blair, I look forward to working with the new Labour Party prime minister to eradicate any remaining insurrectionary elements. We continue to observe the situation in several other countries we believe may have been involved in the 9/11 plot. I regret that General Sharon has refused to cooperate, and I invite the Congress to consider what response may be required.
I would like to thank President Putin of the Russian Federation and the leadership of the People's Republic of China for their wisdom and restraint, especially during the morning of 9/11, when the rebel network engaged in visible preparations for a nuclear launch. I am certain that the great powers, having weathered this storm, will be able to return to the path of confidence building measures at our summit next week.
More details will be announced as soon as practicable. In conclusion, let me say a few words about the state of the world.
I do not assert that terrorism is a spontaneous outgrowth of poverty and misery. In fact, I assert the opposite: terrorism is usually organized by an outside agency, often by a government or a network operating inside a government. But it is certainly true that poverty and misery provide the indispensable environment in which terrorist groups can recruit, or be created by intelligence agencies. In today's world, there are about 2 billion people who are attempting to get by on less than $1 per day. There are some 600 million homeless -- that is equal to about the entire population of Europe. About one and one half billion people do not have clean water to drink. With about one billion people unemployed, the unemployment rate in our world is about 33%, about one third. When that happened in our own country during the 1930s, we called that a great depression, and we must therefore acknowledge the existence of a world economic depression of unprecedented severity today. Two thirds of the people in the world -- 65% -- have never made a phone call. About 40% do not have access to electricity for household use; I would call that a clear need for rural and urban electrification. Every day in this world of ours, some 40,000 human beings perish from malnutrition and from easily treated diseases like diarrhea. Another 40,000 lose their lives each month as the result of warfare, all of which is absolutely futile and which has often been cynically fomented by foreign economic interests. I am thinking here of the crisis in Africa most specifically. In Africa, the standard of living of the average family has declined by 20% over the last twenty years. Eighty-nine countries are now worse off than they were at the beginning of the 1990s. 175 million people leave their home countries every year in the desperate search for jobs and food -- about 3% of humanity. The price of a human slave on the slave markets of southern Europe at this very moment is about 4,000 euros. In the midst of all this, the two hundred fifty-eight richest persons in the world own more in the way of assets and other property than the poorest 3 billion persons. When two hundred fifty eight own more than half of the human population of the world, I hope you will agree with me that such a world cannot be stable. Yet, this is the world that lies before us. I plan to use my powers as president to ameliorate this situation with every means at my disposal, and I call upon the Congress and upon all citizens to support these steps for a new world economic order that will be more just, more equitable, more prosperous, and more dynamic.
We have now been tested in the crucible of a brutal crisis. From this experience we must take renewed devotion to our best values. The decade of globalization has been revealed as a colossal failure, for ourselves as well as for others. We must find a better, more humane, more equitable way of organizing the affairs of this planet, To do this, we must work closely with almost two hundred sovereign states, and work out the details with them, since every country has an inherent right to economic development, science, technology, and dignity. The old imperialism denied these, and the old imperialism is now on the junkheap of history. In the days to come, my two lodestars will be peace and economic development, seen as the two sides of the same coin. Our world has turned over several times in the past month, but I am more certain than ever that I can count on the support of the American people in getting the world back on the right track. I ask you once again to remember the victims of the recent tragedy in your prayers. Good night.
--9/11 Synthetic Terrorism Made in USA, by Webster Griffin Tarpley
[Jack & Archbishop Aurelio Lopez Walking]
[Archbishop Aurelio Lopez] Recently, we have heard rumors about a government program of ...
I'm certain that is an unfounded rumor, Excellency.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Speaking of rumors,
they say there are priests who help the rebels.
[Archbishop Aurelio Lopez] Renegades. Antichrists.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Mmm, mm-hmm.
What -- What is this beautiful stone, Eminence?
[Archbishop Aurelio Lopez] It's a Paradorian sapphire, Excellency.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Your Eminence, may I speak frankly?
[Archbishop Aurelio Lopez] Certainly.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] I think the church ...
would make a beautiful gesture ...
by donating this priceless ring ...
to the poorer members of the flock.
[Takes his ring off, and kisses his hand]
God bless you, Your Eminence.
[Jack Noah Narrating] The people loved me -- well, except for him.
[Unveiling statue of Dictator]
[Jack Noah Narrating] We were a hit. We were a smash.
We were standing room only.
She was sexy, she was smart, she was funny.
She was Marilyn Monroe and Eleanor Roosevelt rolled into one.
And I loved her.
I only had one problem.
I'd been playing the same damn part for almost a year.
[Madonna & Jack riding in a motorcade, waving]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [To Madonna] I'm so goddamned bored I can't see straight.
I don't wanna play this son of a bitch anymore.
I wanna go home, you know?
[Clapping to audience]
I wanna watch the Knicks on TV.
I'd pay big money to see Hollywood Squares.
I hate Alphonse Simms.
[Madonna] Don't fade on me now, Jack.
Look how these people believe in you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] They don't believe in me.
They believe in him.
[Madonna] You really want to abandon these people to Roberto?
[Jack & Madonna look at each other and kiss after coordinating their hats]
[Jack Noah] [Acting Richard III] Sanctuary! Sanctuary!
[Jumps on the bed]
[Jack Noah] Acting Richard III] Listen to my little friends.
That one's Francois.
And this one is Big Bertha. She made me deaf.
Ooh, why were I not made of stone ...
[Jack Noah] like them?
[Pins Madonna down on the bed] Yeah! Mmm!
[Madonna & Jack kiss]
[Jack Noah] I used to think it was ...
the part, you know?
Brando had the part when he did Streetcar,
and De Niro had the part when he did Raging Bull.
[Madonna] [Saying it simultaneously with Jack] Raging Bull.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] But I got the part.
It's not enough.
[Madonna] Do you know what I think?
I think you're playing your best role.
There is no audience to see it.
[Jack & Madonna kiss]
[Jack Noah] Yeah. I'm just an actor.
Oh, I'm just a goddamned actor.
[Madonna] I forgot to tell you. Another movie company has come to Parador.
[Jack Noah] You think everything is cast?
[Director] Okay, five-six all cameras. We've got about 20 minutes of good light. Let's go.
[Woman] Okay, quiet, please! This is a take! And roll it!
[Man] One thirty-two, take one.
[Director] Background action!
[Liz] [Walks into outdoor cafe]
[Liz] Are you Geoff?
[Geoff] Couldn't pay anybody else to be.
[Liz] Well, I'm Liz.
[Geoff] What are you drinkin', Liz?
[Liz] Got something dietetic?
[Geoff] Yeah. Water.
[Geoff] They make a marvelous dry martini here.
[Liz & Geoff hide under table]
[Geoff] Some friends of yours?
[Liz] That's funny. I was gonna ask you the same thing.
[Geoff & Liz] [Kiss under the table]
[Director] Cut! That was fine! Fine!
[Geoff] First of all --
[Liz] That was good for me.
It was good for me.
[Director] Print it. Print it!
[Producer] My director, Edgar Low.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Very efficient.
[Director] Thank you, Mr. President.
[Producer] My leading actor.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You are very good looking.
[Geoff] Thank you, Mr. President.
[Producer] My leading actress.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You are a marvelous actress.
[Kisses her hand]
[Liz] Thank you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Simply marvelous.
[Liz] Thank you.
[Producer] And this is Clint Adler.
He does all our gunshots and explosives -- our special effects.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Congratulations. Yes, very realistic. [Chuckles]
[Clint] Thank you.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Are you enjoying your stay here in Parador?
[Clint] Oh, yes, sir, Your Excellency.
You know, you may not remember, but I was here a year ago with another film.
You came to the set? We shook hands?
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Oh, yes! Yes, I do remember!
Yesh, it's so very good to see you have returned.
[Clint] Oh, I love it here. In fact, this year, I think I'm gonna stay for Carnival.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] You must. You must. Carnival.
Nice to see you again.
[Clint] Thank you, sir. I love it here.
[Menachem] Mr. President.
[Indicating the way]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Menachem, thank you.
[To Madonna] Did you see that?
Clint looked right in my eyes, and I -- I waited for any glint of recognition ...
and there was nothing.
I must be pretty good.
They're doing Streetcar at Lincoln Center. Son of a bitch!
Boy, would I love to reach for Mitch!
[Salsa Music at Carnival]
[Sammy Davis, Jr.] [Singing] Parador
My country so lovely
Your flowers, your mountains, your valleys
Beckon to me
Parador, I love you
Hold me forever
This land of the brave and the free
Your fountains, your beaches, your coffee, your peaches
Your guava and papaya too
Your hammocks, bananas, your moonlit cabanas
Can make all our dreams come true
Parador, I love you
Hold me forever
This land of the brave
and the free
[Assassin walking through crowd, pulls out gun and shoots the Dictator]
[Roberto Strausmann] [Pointing at assassin] Get him!
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Oh!
[Roberto Strausmann] He's an actor!
[Roberto Strausmann] He's an actor!
[Roberto Strausmann] He's an actor!
[Roberto Strausmann] [Falls over stage]
[Crowd surges onto Roberto] Assassin! Assassin! Assassin!
[Madonna] [Cradling Jack in her arms]
[Jack Noah as Dictator] [Grunting]
my -- my Madonna.
[Kisses her hand]
[Feedback from P.A.]
my beloved Parador.
[Jack Noah as Dictator] Good-bye,
my peop --
[Madonna] [Sniffles] Good-bye, my president.
[Roberto Strausmann] [Looks up] I hate actors.
[Dictator put on stretcher and put into ambulance truck with Madonna]
[Jack Noah] [Rising from the dead] Whoa! Oh, boy! What a night, huh?
Is that amazing?
You were fabulous. What a performance!
[Madonna] I was terrible.
[Jack Noah] No, it was great. No, no, no.
[Madonna] I could have been better, much better.
[Jack Noah] No. I listened. I was there.
You're not a good judge,
I'm telling you.
[Jack & Madonna kiss]
[Clint] [Takes his assassin mask off to drive the ambulance]
[Jack Noah] [Uncovers the real, dead, frozen dictator, takes his hat off, and puts it on the Dictator's head]
[To Madonna] Gee. He's defrosting.
[Ike Pappas] This is Ike Pappas reporting from Parador City.
Let me tell you what I know at the moment, advising you that the situation is extremely confused.
First, we know that the president was shot as he moved forward on the reviewing stand.
We later learned that the wounds were fatal.
Roberto Strausmann, the Secretary of the Interior ...
and the head of the National Police, was killed by the crowd.
Dante Guzman, leader of the Revolutionary Front,
has denied any involvement,
and labor leaders have called for a general strike starting tomorrow.
Parador City is a city in chaos and mourning.
The famed singer Sammy Davis Jr. was an eyewitness. Sammy, what happened?
[Sammy Davis, Jr.] Well, Ike, it was probably the most frightening thing I've ever been a part of.
I was standing right next to the president when he died, and, uh,
I was --
I would like to just say to the people of Parador, my sympathies are with them,
and, uh --
You'll have to forgive me, Ike. It was a little rough.
[Ike Pappas] Thank you.
Thank you, Sammy. Now back to New York.
This is Ike Pappas in Parador.
[Ambulance driving through a field where a small airplane rests]
[Clint, Jack & Madonna exit car]
[Jack Noah] Took a lot of balls, Clint.
[Clint] Now you know that special-effects men are nuts.
[Madonna] You should hurry.
[Clint] You gotta move it, Jack.
[Jack Noah] Madonna, come with me.
[Madonna] How can I?
[Jack Noah] God, I'm gonna miss you.
I'm gonna miss this moon.
I don't wanna go.
[Madonna] Go. There is no time.
[Clint] Come on, Jack! Let's roll!
[Jack Noah] Why do these feelings happen when you leave?
I love you, and I love this place.
This has been the greatest time,
and I'll never forget you.
[Madonna] I love you too. I'll call you.
[Jack Noah] You know how to get me in New York.
I have an answering machine and a service.
[Madonna] I'll call your agent.
[Jack Noah] Well, I'm thinking of changing agents.
[Jack Noah] Well, he hasn't called me in a year, the son of a bitch.
[Madonna] Oh, I love you.
[Jack & Madonna kiss]
[Clint] Jack! Let's roll!
[Madonna] I love you.
[Jack Noah] [Sitting in airplane] What a moment!
Right out of Casablanca.
[Desmond Feree] Fantastic! It is right out of Casablanca.
[Toby] It's a bit more like Dynasty, if you ask me.
[Jack Noah] The hardest thing I ever did in my life.
But I'm gonna tell you something.
It just proves to me how much I love acting.
no matter what else happens to me, I'm never gonna have that -- that doubt, you know?
That feeling that I should have done something else with my life.
[Desmond Feree] Bravo.
[Woman] Mr. Allen? Mr. Papp can see you now.
[Toby Allen] Well, I'm sorry. I just don't buy it, Jack.
But it's a great story.
[Shakes Jack's hand]
[Desmond Feree] It's a great story, Jack.
[Jack Noah] [Pats Desmond's leg]
[To receptionist] You got a light?
[Man on TV] We interrupt this program to bring you a special report. We take you to Ike Pappas in Parador City.
Two days of strikes and protests have ended ...
with members of Parador's presiding council fleeing the country,
and the revolutionary council naming a new president.
This has been a revolution all right, but a fairly bloodless one.
The president's body lay in state all day yesterday and today,
with thousands of mourners waiting to pay their respects.
[Gunther Feldmark] [Looking at Alphonse in his casket]
[Mama] [Looking at her dead son in his casket]
[Ike Pappas] All of this ceremony has led to this one remarkable moment.
Parador has a new leader, a woman with a chance to change the course of history.
[Crowd Chanting] Madonna! Madonna! Madonna! Madonna!
Madonna! Madonna! Madonna! Madonna!
Madonna! Madonna! Madonna! Madonna!
[Madonna] [On P.A.] My fellow Paradorians,
I come here to dedicate myself ...
to the memory of our beloved leader ...
whose dreams we must keep alive.
My first act is to declare amnesty ...
for all political prisoners.
[Crowd Cheering] Madonna! Madonna! Madonna! Madonna!
We will dream the impossible dream.
[Receptionist] Mr. Noah, Mr. Papp can see you now.
[Jack Noah] Thanks.
[As Alphonse] Thank you. Thank you so much.
[Man Singing in Spanish]
[Crowd Still Cheering]
[Madonna] [Waving to the crowd]
[Soldier] [Shrugging his shoulders]
[Jack Noah] [Exits the rehearsal building and does Dictator salute to everyone as he walks down the street]
Jack Noah: RICHARD DREYFUSS
Roberto Strausmann: RAUL JULIA
Madonna: SONIA BRAGA
Ralph: JONATHAN WINTERS
Alejandro: FERNANDO REY
Himself: SAMMY DAVIS, JR.
Clint: MICHAEL GREENE
Midge: POLLY HOLLIDAY
Carlo: MILTON GONCALVES
Madame Loop: CHARO
Magda: MARIANNE SAGEBRECHT
Gunther: RENE KOLLDEHOFF
Dieter Lopez: RICHARD RUSSELL RAMOS
Archbishop: JOSE LEWGOY
Toby: DANN FLOREK
Desmond: ROGER AARON BROWN
Jenny: DANA DELANY
Himself: DICK CAVETT
Himself: IKE PAPPAS
Himself: EDWARD ASNER
Momma: CARLOTTA GERSON
1st Dictator: LORIN DREYFUSS
Carmen: NIKA BONFIM
Director: JOHN C. BRODERICK
Edgar Low: DAVID CALE
Menachem Fein: REUVEN BAR-YOTAM
Gordon Boyd: ROD McCARY
Alice: LORA MILLIGAN
Assistant Director: JILL MAZURSKY
Casting Secretary: NINA FINEMAN
Clara: REGINA CASE
Tilde: BIANCA ROSSINI
Paulo: ARIEL COELHO
Forte: GUILHERME KARAN
Nightclub Singer: VERA BUONO
Showgirl: URSULA CANTU
Bearded Man: GUARA
Carnival Girl: GIOVANNA GOLD
Drunk on Street: CARLOS AUGUSTO STRASSER
Woman at Buffet: BETSY MAZURSKY
Man on the Beach: RUI RESENDE
Dante Guzman: FLAVIOR R. TAMBELLINI
Antonio: ANTONIO NEGREIROS
General Sinaldo: NELSON XAVIER
Umberto Solar: MARIO GUIMARAES
Gray Man: NILDO PARENTE
Family Members: JORGE CHERQUES
NEVILLE DE ALMEIDA
Samuel: LUTERO LUIZ
Stunts: MARIA R.F. ARRELLANO
GERARDO M. FLORES
RAUL MARTINEZ YAVEZ
Unit Production Manager: JOHN BRODERICK
First Assistant Director: IRBY SMITH
Second Assistant Director: JAMES W. SKOTCHDOPOLE
Art Director: MARKOS FLAKSMAN
Camera Operator: DAVID BURR
Brazilian First Assistant Director: JOSE JOAQUIN SALLES
Assistant Production Manager: ROBERTO BAKKER
Brazilian Principals & Extras Casting: FLAVIOR R. TAMBELLINI
Production Sound: JIM WEBB, C.A.S.
1st Assistant Camera: ROBERT AGGANIS
Set Decorator: ALEXANDRE MEYER
Script Supervisor: DYNNIE TROUP
2nd Unit Director/Stunt Coordinator: BILL CATCHING
Assistant to Mr. Mazursky: ELIZABETH SAYRE ...
FILMED ENTIRELY ON LOCATION IN RIO DE JANEIRO, OURO PRETO AND SALVADOR DE BAHIA, BRAZIL AND NEW YORK CITY