THIS MODERN WORLD
BY TOM TOMORROW
© Tom Tomorrow 2015
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[Confederate 1] Guns aren't a problem in this country!
[Confederate 2] And racism is a thing of the past! Duh!
[Confederate 1] Also there's no global warming.
1. WE MUSTN'T POLITICIZE THE TRAGEDY
[Confederate 2] It's much too soon to start casting blame!
[Confederate 1] I'd suggest waiting a couple of decades -- to make sure we have sufficient distance!
2. WE SHOULDN'T ALLOW OURSELVES TO BE SIDETRACKED.
[Confederate 1] Just because a White supremacist opened fire in a historic Black church while denouncing Black people --
[Confederate 2] -- I don't see why we have to make the whole thing about race!
3. OBVIOUSLY, THIS PROVES WE NEED MORE GUNS.
[Confederate 1] How can we protect ourselves from all the nutjobs walking around with guns out there --
[Confederate 2] unless EVERYONE is HEAVILY ARMED AT ALL TIMES?
4. LIBERALS ARE SOMEHOW TO BLAME.
[Confederate 2] You know, with their -- um -- permissiveness, and everything.
[Confederate 1] We might need to work on this one.
5. AND OF COURSE -- THIS WAS JUST ANOTHER ISOLATED INCIDENT, FROM WHICH NO GREATER CONCLUSIONS SHOULD BE DRAWN.
[Confederate 1] That's right! An unfathomable act, entirely devoid of context -- as usual!
[Confederate 2] I blame "evil."
[Confederate 1] Yes -- "Evil" is VERY bad!