THIS MODERN WORLD BY TOM TOMORROW
© Tom Tomorrow 2015
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[Russian Blogger] Hello! I am beautiful American swimsuit model who loves apple pie, American flag, popular television programs -- AND VLADIMIR PUTIN! Heh hey. [Tap tap tap]
AMERICANS REALIZED THEY'D BEEN CAUGHT NAPPING
[Male Reporter] The Russians are leaving us in the DUST! It's just like SPUTNIK -- except with TROLLS!
[Female Reporter] We must spare NO expense to close the TROLL GAP!
THE PRESIDENT ANNOUNCED A NEW NATIONAL INITIATIVE.
[Obama] -- and so, we choose to troll HARDER than the Russians ever could -- not because it is easy -- but because there are LULZ!
A RAGTAG CREW WAS ASSEMBLED.
[General] You men are the best of the worst at mansplaining, doxxing, and anonymous harassment! Now we want you to use those skills for your COUNTRY!
[Geek Twerp] Consider the Russkies OWNED, sir!
BATTLES WERE FOUGHT ... CASUALTIES INCURRED ...
[Nasty Blogger Soldier 1] My carpal tunnel is REALLY acting up! You guys are gonna have to go on without me!
[Nasty Blogger Soldier 2] We won't do it, Sarge! We NEVER leave a man behind!
[Nasty Blogger Soldier 1] That's a DIRECT ORDER, son. Now, has anyone seen the ibuprofen?
BUT IN THE END, THE RUSSIANS NEVER HAD A CHANCE AGAINST OUR BOYS
[White House Shitbag] What does it mean, "Ethics in Gaming Journalism?"
[General] Uh oh ...
[HUGE TIP O' THE PEN(GUIN) TO JEET HEER!]