Introduction and Chapter 1. Welcome to India, from "All You Need is Love: An Eyewitness Account of When Spirituality Spread from the East to the West" [Excerpt]by Nancy Cooke de Herrera
Foreword by Deepak Chopra
© 2003 by Nancy Cooke de Herrera
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IntroductionMy LIFE has been blessed. I have experienced the extraordinary in peoples, places, and situations, given birth to four happy, caring children, and loved from the depth of my soul. In spite of the loss of this great love, I found the path to peace and to the beauty of simplicity. I grew up in a family with a father, mother, grandfather, and two sisters. Our home in Northern California was supportive, loving, and close. This happy foundation encouraged me to later become an adventuresome risk-taker. One of the qualities I still possess today, which I am grateful for, is an insatiable sense of curiosity that's seemed to be inherent from birth. It is a fascination that has evolved from the innocence of a child to the understanding of a person attracted to spirituality out of a need to comprehend love and loss. I needed to know there is justice in the universe!
Shaken to the core, and left with four young children in Argentina after my husband, Luis's, death, I felt empty, abandoned, and alone. At the same time I knew there had to be a just reason for taking from me this magical person I so deeply loved. I could not face the word "eternity," which I saw carved on most headstones as I prepared for his burial. I wouldn't allow myself to think of never having contact with Luis again. There had to be something more.
Out of a genuine desire to comfort and support, a dear friend Biju Nehru from India, sent me a book, titled The Autobiography of a Yogi, about the life, teachings, and philosophy of Paramhansa Yogananda. His remarkable childhood, his encounters with many saints and sages during his search throughout India for an illumined teacher, the ten years of training by a revered yoga master, and especially his discussions on reincarnation, were all I needed to spark more than an interest in visiting his mystical homeland. So, it was not unexpected that seven years after Luis's death, I found myself, in 1962, landing in India to seriously begin my spiritual exploration.
In spite of obvious poverty, most Indians seem happy and energetic. They believe in something. Everyone has a little altar in his home for daily prayer. They live their spirituality. They love and help each other. Over and over again I witnessed the loving hospitality of these beautiful people. They may be poor, but they know about love.
Wandering through the mountain villages, and into the Valley of the Saints, I spoke with a variety of locals, holy men, and sages. Ultimately, I was directed by Swami Shivananda to Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, the founding father of Transcendental Meditation (TM). He would become my mentor, guru, and friend. We would travel the world together spreading his words of love, peace, and the benefits of meditation. I would become a teacher of TM, an "initiator," which I continue to be to this day. When The Beatles, the most popular music group at the time, came to the ashram in India to learn from Maharishi, it helped open the door to the Western mind about the value of meditation. It was an exciting time. Spirituality spread from the East to the West!
What transpired from that point to now has taken me through cathartic transformation time and again. When I started meditation, friends would often express dismay, "You're not sick, you're not that old! Why do you need such a crutch?" In later years many of these same persons came to me for help. Starting out, my goal was finding if justice does exist in the universe. Now I know it does; nothing happens by chance, and everything happens for a reason.
I am a person interested in spirituality, but still live fully in this world. I have given up nothing; I have added to my life. The "path of the householder" does not require withdrawal, as does the "path of the monk." I have experienced "inner bliss," and the consciousness of "being." I have learned that love is an essential but earned emotion, and a sense of guilt is a waste of time. "As we sow, so shall we reap." Would I have done things differently when I look back on the past? Maybe, but it has been a learning process. And on the path I have encountered some of the most enchanting and intriguing personalities.
Maharishi teaches we must learn it all -- life, death, and after death. He says, "To learn only about life, is like taking a course in oceanography and only studying the waves." Over the years many spiritual students and friends have asked me, " How did you find your path? What is different with TM from prayer or guided relaxation? What has it done for you?" In writing this book I hope I have answered many questions. It has been an exciting life, and who knows what lies around the next corner.
Gratefulness is said to be one of the most spiritual of words. For this opportunity to share with you, I am most grateful. So, come along with me through my initial turbulent trials to a place of serenity. I went out looking for answers, India taught me where to find them -- they were within me all the time.
As you travel your own path through life, may you remember, all you need is love and faith.
-- NANCY COOKE DE HERRERA
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Part One: Changing Focus on Life
1. Welcome to IndiaON A DARK, STARLESS NIGHT in March of 1962, I had a premonition that I was about to take a step into the unknown as my plane descended onto the landing strip of Delhi, India. I knew I was on a search for some deeper understanding of my own spirituality. I had finished the book, Autobiography of a Yogi, after my husband, Luis de Herrera's death. A close friend, Ambassador B.K. (Biju, as I called him) Nehru, the Indian Ambassador to the United States, had sent it to me as a token of consolation. He felt it might give some answers to my many questions at that time about what happened once we passed on from this life. While reading this book, I became enveloped with the desire to know the truth, if any, there was to the stories about life after death.
While reading the book, I not only became fascinated with the life of Yogananda, but also became inspired by the India described in the footnotes throughout, and thus set out to seek some answers that I sensed might be found in this exotic land. Having experienced such grief at Luis's loss, I wanted to find something more to believe in than the "hellfire and damnation" that seemed to be layered in the Christian books I had read. I needed to have some hope that somehow we would be together once more. The possibility of it fueled my sense of adventure. Would this mystical land supply me with answers to the questions that had haunted me for seven years? After all, India was known as the cradle of spiritual knowledge. It raised my curiosity enough that once again in my life, I found myself taking the risk to step out into the unknown.
Little did I know that in the next weeks, months, and years, my journey would take me from the origin of the Ganges to the Valley of the Saints and back home to California, and back again. Time after time. It became a continuum, like a circle -- no beginning, and no end. How was I to know that this particular trip would change my life forever?
I had been traveling around the world as a goodwill personality with the U.S. State Department giving lectures on customs, costumes, and cultures. I was known as the U.S. Ambassadress of Fashion, and therefore, was accustomed to being welcomed by governments with a full agenda of activities awaiting me. On this night, however, I was an unofficial visitor, strictly on my own. India was a new horizon for me. Not knowing a soul in this ancient and mysterious country, I prayed that my good friend Tom Slick would be there to meet me.
Three months had passed since our last communication about my coming -- would he show up? I was to meet Tom, a Texas oilman and parapsychologist, and our plan was to roam the Himalayan foothills together calling on lamas, swamis, and yogis. While Tom was searching for psychic phenomena, levitation, teleportation, and materialization, I would follow my own search.
When a steward opened the door of the plane, an earthy fragrance filled the cabin. A wave of insecurity washed over me as I climbed down the ramp and looked through the airport lights for the customs house. Then as the soft air caressed me, a thrill of anticipation pushed away my insecurities.
"I'm finally in India. This is the moment I have been waiting for."
I'd come directly from Tehran where, as a guest of the Shah of Iran, I had presented a fashion show to provide publicity for The New Path Society. This was a group of Iranian women who were attempting to ban the obligatory usage of the chador and the facial veil that the women had been wearing for centuries.
"Where is my natural love of adventure?" I silently asked, prodding myself into a confident air. "No matter what happens, it will be fine. If Tom's not here, I'll check into a hotel and in a few days go on to Bangkok."
We were herded into a low, tin-roofed shed glaring with fluorescent lights. A uniformed Indian reached for my suitcase keys, asking in clipped English, "Have you anything to declare, Memsahib?" I shook my head, indicating no, and scanned the crowd teeming in the balmy air around me. Standing nearly six feet tall, I looked out over the crowd but saw nothing familiar. "Oh please, Tom, be here. I have such expectations for this trip."
Emaciated bearers waited by the exit, their somber eyes scrutinizing the passengers. One porter placed three large suitcases on another's head. White-turbaned Sikhs with dark faces and curled up beards milled among brown-skinned women in bright saris. Then, finally, a broad, sunburned forehead framed by prematurely gray hair and mystical, silver-blue eyes peered through the congestion. A smile of recognition lighted the face.
"Tom, over here!" I pushed my way past the passengers. "Boy, am I glad to see you. I was wondering what I'd do if you were not here."
Tom gave me a hug and laughed. "Welcome to India," he said. "You look like a rhapsody in blue. And that blonde mane of yours is like a beacon in this place. You were easy to find."
While at Yale, Tom opted for a life of scientific research rather than the world of oil exploration. From a fortune in huge oil deposits discovered by his late father, he had the financial reserves to make such a choice.
He had established several important foundations, but his favorite was The Mind Science Foundation in San Antonio, Texas, and nothing was too unusual for him to consider. Several months before, I accompanied him looking for Bigfoot (also known as the Yeti, or Abominable Snowman) in the Trinity Alps, a primitive area of Northern California.
A well-built 5'9", Tom, intellectually and spiritually, was my soul mate. He challenged my horizons, he excited me with his ideas, and I felt safe with him. Romantically, time would tell. Neither of us was pushing for a commitment, although we had a close relationship. For now, I was thrilled by his presence.
Tom frowned at my four-inch heels. "Let's get you off those stilts and down to my size. From now on you'll be in hiking boots and khaki."
"I'll be delighted to get out of these clothes, but I had to make an elegant departure from Tehran."
"You will find plenty of material here for your next lecture series."
"I've already thought of that. My agent will make a new brochure with the pictures I'll bring back."
Tom signaled a turbaned porter to secure my bags, and soon we were in an old-fashioned taxi rattling into the night. Little could be seen in the darkness; wooden-wheeled bullock carts passed silently in the opposite direction, their shrouded drivers asleep as the animals patiently plodded along. There was almost no traffic, other than a stray cow or two.
Excitement had pushed away my fatigue. "Okay, I'm here ... ready to go ... when do we start?"
"Early tomorrow morning. But the first order of business is to get you to the hotel and to sleep. Later this afternoon, an Indian parapsychologist from Rajasthan University, Ranjit Ganguli, will join us. He'll bring a Yogiwho will demonstrate complete control over his body. While we take his pulse, he will stop his heartbeat for minutes; then he'll send blood to any part of his body we indicate."
"It sounds fascinating."
"It could be more than fascinating -- it could be very practical," he replied with a twinkle in his eye. I ignored his innuendo; my interest was on our travel plans.
"Later you can take a tour of the city, and tonight we go to a ball at the French Embassy."
"And tomorrow, where do we go?"
"To A1mora, in the mountains near the Tibetan border. Hopefully, we will find Lama Anagarika Govinda. Govinda is translating Buddhist works into books for Western readers. He's well-known in England where he lectures yearly."
This was particularly interesting to me. Previously, during a period of stress and indecision in my life, I had sought answers in Buddhist literature. However, even though the Buddhist emphasis on compassion attracted me, I found the writings unfathomable. I would need to learn a new language to understand the texts.
Religion had always fascinated me. At times this interest got me into trouble. During the seventh grade, while attending a private convent, I asked so many questions during catechism the nuns finally dismissed me from class and had me take art during that hour instead. Yes, I looked forward to meeting Govinda.
Soon our car turned off Jan Path, Delhi's main shopping thoroughfare, into a driveway lined with stately palm trees that led to the Imperial Oberoi Hotel. A magnificently uniformed Sikh doorman greeted us and led the way into a dark wood-paneled lobby, straight out of the thirties. It was inviting and appropriate. Again I noticed the smell of India. It seemed to impart a mixture of flowers, smoke, and earth.
An hour later, unpacked, bathed, and lying on cool sheets, I watched the ceiling fan turn slowly, my thoughts turning with it. "Am I really here resting on a hotel bed in India?" As far away from my family in California as I could be, I wondered what my three sons and daughter were doing. It was yesterday for them, I realized.
A flood of love and gratitude washed over me as I thought of Mother. By living with us, and with the help of our housekeeper, she made it possible for me to follow my career. My two sisters also lived nearby, completing this support system.
A year after my husband's death in Argentina, we left our home in Buenos Aires and all the happy memories it contained, and returned to San Francisco. It was a painful but correct decision, and now, seven years later, things were going well; my children were thriving, and I loved my profession, along with the financial stability it provided.
With this contented thought, and to the sounds of birds greeting the Indian day, jet lag won out and I fell into a deep sleep.
The next morning, Tom, Ranjit Ganguli -- an earnest young Indian -- and I set out on our journey in a brand new Dodge, a real luxury in India. Our Sikh driver, Kali, was so proud of his car that every time we came to a bump in the road he made us get out and walk. Then when the radiator boiled over, we found he didn't know how to open the hood.
"I think we're in for trouble," announced Tom. "We would have been smarter to stick to the Indian-made Ambassador car; every driver knows how to fix them."
We traveled over rough terrain, across the hot Ganges plain as we headed north. The hours passed rapidly, as everything was a feast for the eyes. Tom was an encyclopedia on India. "The first time I came here I hated it; the next trip I fell in love with it. It's important to meet this country properly." This was his eighth trip, so I knew I was in good hands.
At night while the driver slept in the car, Ranjit, Tom, and I shared Spartan sleeping quarters, usually a DAK bungalow, a kind of primitive cement hut built by the British for passing travelers. We bathed out of a bucket, and our beds consisted of four posts and a webbed frame over which we spread our bedrolls -- hardly conducive to flaming romance.
For food by day, I lived on hardboiled eggs, fresh oranges, bananas, and peanut butter, rather than eat in the dirty places available. "If you stick to Punjabi food straight out of the boiling oil, you will be safe," cautioned Tom, but I treasured my powdered milk and the other staples I'd picked up in Delhi. At night we'd get the DAK bungalow attendant to buy fresh vegetables, which were plentiful, and cook our meal over a small fire in front of us. This way I knew what we were eating -- I was taking no chances with dysentery.
Soon snow-capped mountains were visible, but it was slow going. We had just spent a day waiting for a mechanic to come from a far away village to fix the car. Tom had had it with delays; he decided to go on without the troublesome Dodge or its driver. "Kali will go back and we will continue by bus."
The bus was memorable. The windows were so dirty one could hardly see out. A leathery-faced old hillsman sat backwards, cleaning his teeth with a stick and staring at me without interruption.
"You are a one-woman show for him," laughed my companion. "He may never have seen blue eyes before."
The bus driver rarely took his hand off the horn. Women got on with naked babies, and everyone took turns helping the mothers. It didn't matter that the baby would wet the pants of the obliging passenger. Everyone laughed and chatted. I felt as though I were on the "Toonerville Trolley." When we came to villages, we got down to tend to bathroom necessities -- it was my introduction to standing on two footblocks and squatting.
It was getting cold as we gained altitude. "Look at that, Tom, I'm impressed! In spite of this chilly weather, those people are bathing. They wash their few rags and then put them on again."
He explained, "It's part of the Hindu religion to bathe daily, even if it means going into a cold river. You rarely smell any body odor amongst the hill people."
There was constant activity in the villages. Everyone seemed to have a job to do. "These people don't seem to be starving, as most Westerners think," I remarked.
"It is all worked out on a barter system. When statistics report that the average Indian lives on only two rupees a day, it's misleading."
Finally we arrived in the hill station of Almora. The imprint of the British Raj still remained in the architecture of what had originally been summer residences. Lama Govinda's home was another five miles of walking. So huffing, puffing, and suffering in the thin, cold air at 6,000 feet, we traversed the final mountain slope astonished by the magnificent scenery around us.
With no means of communication, there was no way to ascertain that the Lama would be there, or that he would receive us. Tom explained the term lama as when a Buddhist monk becomes a teacher and has a following, he earns the title of lama.
Finally, a small stone house came into view. A tall pole stood between the building and us. From its top fluttered long white clothes covered with strange print. Tom explained, "These are Buddhist prayer flags. Each Tibetan family has its own prayer mark; they use it to stamp cloth after cloth until they create a whole grove of flags as evidence of their devotion. As the wind blows, the prayers flutter their way up to heaven." I thought, "What fun to do this at home."
The heavy rough-hewn front door opened and a thin, angular-faced European woman stood on the threshold. With long, flowing robes and her hair tucked into a hood that arched over her dark-rimmed eyes, she could have been from another century. Hardly pausing to study us, she tipped her head to the side with a smile and said, "I am Li Gotami, the lama's wife. My husband is working, but he will be pleased to receive you." We felt such relief at her welcome.
Li Gotami escorted us into a small, bare room. The whitewashed, stone walls bore the scant decoration of mandalas, portraits of monks, and mountain scenes. There was little furniture on the stone floor. Thangkas, Tibetan scrolls, hung from the ceiling.
On a carpeted platform, spotlighted by sunshine beaming through a tall window, sat a frail figure. Above his burgundy and saffron robes, the man wore a loose wool cap, which hung below his ears and rose to a point high over his head. This framed a thin face with bushy eyebrows, deep-hollowed blue eyes, and an aquiline nose. A thin white beard hung from the tip of his chin. This was Govinda; born to German parents in Bolivia, he was, at 64, the most revered Western-born lama.
I followed Tom's example and greeted him with my hands pressed together -- prayer like -- in namaste fashion, the traditional Indian salutation. Then I ventured, "Mi querido Padre. Con mucho gusto conocerle."
"Gracias -- y yo tambien, Senora."
Govinda inquired about my Spanish and how I happened to have a name like de Herrera.
"My late husband was an Uruguayan."
Govinda bobbed his head enthusiastically. "Yes, yes ... I know that continent well. My grandfather was a comrade in arms to Simon Bolivar, one of the gran libertadores of South America." With this, he gestured for us to sit on cushions lying on the floor.
"Your Holiness," Tom said, introducing himself. "I have come to you for help. I am seeking proof of psychic and physical phenomena that can be repeated under scientifically controlled conditions at my Mind Science Foundation in Texas. I believe that if we can demonstrate these abilities in a manner beyond dispute, we will be able to get our foot in the door of the Western mind and open up new realms for exploration."
Govinda's face exhibited little. He drew Tom out, asking him to enlarge on some of his points. Then he seemed to make up his mind; evidently he would trust this stranger's motives and talk freely. I felt relief; I'd been praying for four days that this would not be a false lead.
"To us Buddhists, such attempts to 'prove' extrasensory perception through scientific tests seem crude and laughable. The conditions for these experiments are in themselves the greatest hindrance to any success." Govinda's cheeks flushed. He paused and cleared his throat. "By reaching for objectivity, you exclude the emotional and spiritual elements of the human mind, without which no state of real contemplation can be created."
We were jolted by his concise appraisal. Seeing the expression on my face, Govinda softened his voice. "In Tibet, our concentration and psychic sensibility is greatly increased in the solitude and silence of nature. The mind is not blunted and diverted from itself by the noise and activity of modern life. Rather, it becomes spiritually attuned and can enter into a silent communication with other attuned minds." His eyes shifted back toward Tom as he gently added, "Thus, telepathy is common among Tibetans."
Tibetan children at the Self-Help Center (Mussoorie, India)Whether it was the musky incense or the conviction of this uncommon man, I sensed myself slipping into another dimension. Govinda continued, "Whenever the object of concentration comes before the mind, it takes on a greater reality and can then be held and contemplated with full attention. The past is telescoped into the present and the present shows itself not as a dividing line between a past that has died and a future that has yet to be born, but as a single aspect of the co-existence and continuous body of living experience in four dimensions .... "
"Do you believe in the existence of the fourth dimension?"
"It is amusing, young man, that just two weeks ago a Professor Heisenberg came here to ask me about that subject."
"Heisenberg!" I was astonished. Recently I had read an article about Heisenberg, the discoverer of quantum physics. I almost shouted, "The man who won the Nobel Prize? Do you mean he came all the way here?"
Govinda nodded, "Yes, that is the same man. Apparently, modern mathematicians are reaching such complicated answers they need to learn about the fourth dimension in order to explain them. They know we understand this dimension." He smiled as he shared this confidence.
Excitedly, Tom pursued the topic and soon the lama was describing one of his own psychic experiences. He related how lung gumpa, the Tibetan walking levitation, came over him once in a perilous situation and brought him back to safety ... he was able to walk across a lake!
Tom concentrated on getting an exact description of the event, but I felt he was ignoring the state of mind, which evokes such feats-the physical phenomenon was but the momentary effect of a mental state, which could have far greater implication in our lives. Govinda was showing us a path to unlimited possibilities. Casting aside my timidity, I asked, "Your Holiness, if one is interested in seeking spiritual knowledge, how should one begin?"
"First you must practice meditation, my lady. Meditation is essential for the evolution of the soul."
"But how do I learn this?" The cushion on the floor was no longer un-comfortable.
"You will need a teacher. He will teach you ... there are many forms of meditation. Some use the breath, some a mantra, some use colors .... "
"What is a mantra?"
"It is a sacred sound vibration which awakens and stimulates the intuitive qualities of the mind. But leave this to your guru; he will know what is best for you." His eyes penetrated mine as he said, "Always remember, your guru will be in a mortal body and only be a certain percent divine; so forgive his weakness and keep your eye on the divine."
"Your Holiness, do you believe in reincarnation?"
He smiled, "Yes, we believe the soul evolves through many lifetimes."
Later, Tom said that was like asking the lama if he breathed. But I wasn't discouraged; I had to begin somewhere. Ever since my husband's death, I had been looking for assurance that there is justice in the universe. I had already concluded it involved more than one lifetime to work out that justice, so Govinda's words encouraged me.
Later that afternoon as we descended the mountainside, I felt as if I were walking on clouds. I was dizzy and my vision out of focus. The world around me seemed like a Van Gogh painting. I could see swirls spinning in cartwheels against the alpenglow. Everything was in motion.
"Tom, I don't know what's happening. I have such a strange feeling, as if I were drunk."
He laughed, "You have become 'sensitized.' Just by sitting near such a saintly man, you receive his darshan, the energy, the good vibrations."
"I feel as though my heart will break open, it's so full of happiness. Boy, if we could ever bottle this, we'd retire for life!"
"Speaking of bottles, is that a bottle of scotch I see in that store?" We had come into a local center; on both sides of the road were little stall-like shops. This particular shop sold everything from soap to incense -- and scotch. The Haig and Haig was dirty but intact. The proprietor said he'd had it for over ten years. "I bet he was getting worried that he'd never sell it," said Tom.
Later we celebrated in the men's waiting room at the railroad station, where we spent the night on benches. There were no hotels, and I refused to stay alone in the women's section. From my knapsack I produced a can of caviar I'd brought from Iran. We had a party while Ranjit looked on with distaste. I don't know whether it was due to our repast, or due to the fact that I, a woman, was in the men's room.
The morning train took us to Dehradun, a former site of a major British cantonment. After a splendid cup of tea, it was the bus again, this time to Hardwar, the second most holy place in India, located on the banks of the Ganges. As it was my first glimpse of the sacred river, I insisted on running down the ghat steps and wading in the water before we started our search for a revered yogi Tom had been told about.
We had a name and no directions, but miraculously we found him sitting on top of a cement temple, his naked body baking in the sun.
After Ranjit convinced him in Hindi, the little dried-up man begrudgingly agreed to talk to us. He asked for a glass of water to illustrate his point. When the glass appeared, we were each requested to touch the water. The yogi then held it quietly, and we watched the liquid turn solid! Ranjit then asked us to touch it again to verify that it was now ice. We were thunderstruck] We had not expected anything like this. The man wore only a loincloth, had no props, it was a hot day, and we were not hypnotized.
The holy man told Ranjit, "Water is made up of so many molecules of hydrogen and oxygen. Ice is the same; all I have done is to change the characteristic of the water by altering the rate of vibration of the molecules."
Scowling, he continued, "You are scientists; can you control nature peacefully? You will destroy the world with your science; leave this place and bother us no more, or stay and learn union with God." His eyes shut in dismissal.
Later, in a noisy taxi we debated about what we'd seen. "There is no scientific explanation for what we have just observed." I had majored in chemistry at Stanford; I was scientifically oriented.
"Agreed, but the title yogi is given only after the individual demonstrates his ability to control nature," Tom pointed out. "That old boy sure earned his credentials. If only I'd had a movie camera."
"Someone would insist you'd faked it," I consoled, but I knew we had just witnessed something that was impossible.
Tom was in high spirits ... now he knew this expedition would make history. "Our next goal is to find a swami named Sivananda who lives in Rishikesh." It was 13 miles north of Hardwar over a windy road full of potholes, which did not slow down our driver for a minute. He roared through the congestion of carts, animals, bicycles, and horsedrawn tongas, buggies, overloaded with passengers. Tom chuckled as I held my breath and prayed. "I don't think it's our karma to be killed on the way to The Valley of the Saints."
"The hell with our karma, what if the driver thinks it's good for his karma to die in such a holy place?"
It's called The Valley of the Saints because of the holy men who live there near the headwaters of the Mother Ganga. The valley is dotted with numerous temples and ashrams, or religious academies. Most of these clustered near the town, perched on the river bank. Sivananda, the most revered of the saints, had the largest ashram in this spiritual center.
The streets were lined with small wooden stalls. Through the car window I could make out piles of vegetables, dried grains, brassware, brightly colored yard goods, religious objects, and crudely made household tools. Men haggled over prices while others gathered around open braziers, where turbaned Sikhs prepared vegetable dishes in wok-like pans filled with spitting hot oil. The enticing scent of curry was everywhere.
Suddenly our driver screeched to a halt. Ahead, like a sea of dirty laundry, swirled an impenetrable confusion of carts and pedestrians. He turned his sweat-beaded brow to Tom and said, "You walk now, Sahib."
Tom leaned forward, "How will we find The Divine Life Forest Academy?"
"No problem, Sahib. It is very close." He pointed to a street corner about a hundred yards away, "There turn right, walk down to river embankment and turn left. Ashram easy to find." The din enveloped his singsong English as Tom opened the door. I put my dark glasses on to ease the glare and keep out the dust. Beggars and hawkers ran up trying to attract our attention and money. Tom grabbed our daybag and pulled me by the hand, ignoring pleas and gestures of baksheesh.
There were no sidewalks, so we zigzagged down the center of the dusty, clay road -- retreating to the sides every few steps to avoid rickshaws and carts. Making our way slowly, we encountered a group of lepers sitting on the side of the street. They were horribly disfigured. Some balanced their dented cups between handless limbs; without lips or noses they pleaded for alms. Others held out their walking sticks to bar our passage and force a gift from us. I froze, not wanting to touch anything they had handled.
"Here, take these small coins," Tom said, forcing them into my paralyzed hand, "Put one in each cup and they'll leave you alone."
I did what he said, but tried not to look at the pathetic creatures. It was hard to realize they were human -- this thought made me feel guilty. "Oh, Tom, why must people exist in such horrible condition?"
"Yes, I know, but the Indian government does provide a place for lepers to live."
"Can you imagine what those places are like if they'd rather live here and beg?"
We began to walk faster. Just before the corner a rickshaw backed us against the wall; I felt a hand lightly tap my shoulder, "Baksheesh, Memsahib?"
I spun around to see a naked man daubed all over with ashes. His black hair was coiled on top of his head and a huge live snake hung from his neck. I gasped and threw my last coins at him.
Tom tugged me around the corner; nothing seemed to faze him. "The driver said to turn here ... " The crowd thinned out as we descended toward the swiftly flowing waters of the Ganges. Across the wide river whitewashed domes and temples fringed the far bank. All appeared empty except for one huge building, which was entirely covered with ornate printing.
"What's that?" I asked.
"It is the Gita Bhavan. A wealthy and devout Hindu built it to shelter those who want to study the Bhagavad Gita and other scriptures. The decorative printings are Vedic quotes."
Suddenly on our left was a high wall. Crude brick stairs ran up its side and ended in a gated archway. Square black letters surrounded by colored lights announced Sivananda's ashram.
We must have been observed climbing the stairs, for as we crossed the stone courtyard, a gaunt, dark Indian in white robes came out of a room on the far side and walked toward us in greeting.
"I am Chidananda, secretary and disciple to His Holiness Swami Sivananda." When he heard why we had come, he smiled, "You are in luck. His Holiness has just come out of a long meditation and will be giving an audience shortly. But we must hurry."
We followed him into the main building and down a stairway to a basement called the "meeting cave." He seated us on a wooden bench against a cold, damp wall, and excused himself. Other disciples, or chelas, of the Swami, Westerners mostly, had already gathered in the room. They sat on pillows strewn about the earthen floor. Their heads were shaven and their white robes bespoke their devotion. Tom and I shifted on our bench, trying to be comfortable without leaning against the wet wall.
Little light came into the cave and many candles were burning. Smoke mingled with the sinuous trails of incense and the sweet aroma of flowers. Potted plants were clustered near a chair at one end of the room. Mildewed and peeling whitewashed walls were heavily decorated with religious paintings depicting blue Krishnas, photographs of sadhus, or holy beggars, and figurines of animal-headed gods. Between these hung garlands of dusty artificial flowers. Some of the chelas sat in the lotus posture with their eyes closed, their hands cradling a humble offering to their master. Others lounged, talking to their colleagues, glancing at us with interest. There were about 20 in all.
Chidananda reappeared at a door near the chair. Turning and looking expectantly back through the opening, he slowly retreated from the entrance. "The master is coming," he announced quietly. The students jumped to their feet and held out their offerings, making short, shallow bows and uttering low chanting sounds.
A broad, hairless, yellow-brown head floated calmly into the room. Chelas threw themselves to the floor to kiss Sivananda's feet. The massive holy man slowly made his way through the commotion, waving blessings to all. He accepted fruit and flowers from those in his path, while others stood behind him, bestrewing his coat with rose petals. Finally, when he stood before his chair, he motioned for everyone to sit and then did so himself.
A disciple picked his way through the crowd and received permission to place a heavy garland of orange targate flowers around the Swami's neck. Sivananda put his feet on a stool, revealing velvet boots. He beamed as he slowly reviewed his congregation. A camel-hair coat magnified his immense frame. His brown eyes appeared slightly crossed behind a bulbous nose, but this did not negate a powerful, confident demeanor.
When his gaze came around to us, he called Chidananda to his side. Learning who we were, he welcomed us to his ashram in good English. He instructed his secretary to take the garland from his shoulders and to place it on mine. Everyone turned to look at me; it was an honor, but it was heavy and I felt like a horse that had just won the Derby.
Sivananda intoned to his chelas, "Come, let's have one of you rise and tell our guests what you have learned here at the Academy." Not one, but more than half the gathering stood up in turn and told of their gratitude and love for their master, for the wisdom he bestowed on them. Then the Swami began a discourse. He pitched his comments toward Tom, turning to us while describing the achievements of science.
Taking advantage of a pause, Tom asked rhetorically if scientific knowledge was leading to peace. The answer came back, "No, to destruction! In order to generate peaceful vibrations, one must possess individual tranquility, which alone will pave the way to world peace. This requires self-discipline ... this is what we practice here."
Giving Tom a confident smile, he concluded, "A scientist without discipline is a danger to the world. You should learn to meditate."
My thoughts went back to the irate "ice yogi." Evidently, science was a dirty word in the Valley. How differently Lama Govinda had received Tom as a scientist.
Tom was nonplused by the Swami's ardor, but asked, "Your Holiness, could you explain about meditation? What does it offer a scientist?"
"What are the benefits of meditation?" A smile flickered across his face, and he played to the crowd. He talked at length about meditation and its goals. "Meditation helps the mind to rule the senses and the practitioner to control his mind." This quickly led into a description of the path to God-realization, and, prompted by questions from the chelas, to comments on the Divine Presence, Advaitic Unity, Sadhana -- Atmic Glory -- we were lost. Was he speaking English? The garland got heavier. I was tempted to take it off, but was afraid of insulting some tradition.
When the discourse ended, Sivananda came over and sat between Tom and me, ordering a chela to take a picture. An ancient camera was produced which made a flash and a puff of white smoke. Only when he took leave of us did I notice his wrinkled hands and realize he was a very old man.
As the Swami left, the students chanted and rang small bells ... they ignited powders and passed around strange things to eat, combinations of seeds, pastes, and dried fruits. Leery of food prepared by unclean hands, I took no chances, and, pretending to eat, dropped what I was given inside the front of my blouse.
After Sivananda retired, Chidananda came over and sat next to me. "What did you think of Swamiji?" He used the suffix-ji, which I had learned was a form of endearment.
There being no point in pretense, I said, "My impressions are somewhat negative. All the ritual and the kissing of feet are simply not for me."
Chidananda's face showed compassion. "Yes, I could see that in your expression. There is much you do not understand." He gestured for Tom to listen and continued. "If Swamiji could have his way, none of this obeisance would take place. When he first came out of the forest where he lived for years in solitude, people fell to the ground to kiss his feet. He had no choice but to let them show their devotion to him in such humble ways, or they felt themselves unworthy."
That seemed rational to me. He then went on to tell us about the Academy and its students, and describe their practice of self-discipline. He encouraged me to ask questions and later, as he escorted us to the gate, asked me, "Did you ever think of finding a guru for yourself?"
"Yes, I'm looking for a teacher to guide me, but I'm not ready to renounce my worldly life. It's a dilemma for me."
Chidananda's eyes darkened, "Yes, it is hard to renounce." Then he brightened and offered, "Perhaps I can help you. There is a swami, very respected by Sivananda, with an ashram across the river who appeals to Western students. He teaches the path of the householder, and requires no withdrawal from worldly activity. You might talk with him; his name is Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. Perhaps he will be the teacher for you. If not, do not worry, we have a saying here: 'When the chela [student] is ready, the master appears.'''
We bid the friendly holy man goodbye and headed for the river to find the man named Mahesh. Tom was just as curious as I. A barge-like boat was departing for the opposite bank and we asked if we could ride along; already overcrowded, the passengers made room for us. Quietly, numerous pairs of dark eyes stared at us. I tried to pull myself in from being touched by the ash-covered saint sitting next to me.
Tom had explained, "The ashes keep him warm."
A small child extended her hand to my hair. Her mother explained, "Please excuse my daughter. She has a doll with hair like yours, and wants to touch it." We laughed and answered her questions as to where we were from and what we were doing there. Before long we reached the other side and asked a kind-looking man on the shore where we might find Mahesh and directions to the ashram.
"Oh, you are too late. Maharishi has just left for California. It is a pity; he is a very respected teacher."
So we were saved a climb up the hill. Little did I know then how many times I would return to this exact place in the future and make that climb.
THE YOGA-VEDANTA FOREST ACADEMY
P.O. SIVANANDANAGAR, RISHIKESH
DIST. DEHRA DUN, HIMALAYAS, lNDIA.
Founder
Sri Swami Sivananda
17.6.62
Srl Nancy Cooke,
California.
Rev. Immortal Self,
Salutations and adorations. Om Namo Narayanaya.
I am delighted to go through the contents of your kind letter of the 8th instant.
Kindly send a copy of the book that you are intending to publish for our library. I am sure your notes and experiences on your trip here with Mr. Glick will prove to be of great inspiration to others in your country and our own students here.
All your friends are welcome to this abode. Welcome to all of them! I shall attend to them all and serve them. I am sure by your efforts and influence more and more of your countrymen will take interest in the Eastern culture and philosophy and find peace and solace in them.
May Lord bless you all with fine health, long life, joy, peace and eternal happiness!
Will deep regards, Prem and OM,
Thy own Self,
Sivananda